Buzzing Jokes / Recent Jokes

As a mother was walking past her daughter's closed bedroom door, she heard a strange buzzing noise coming from the room. Quietly opening the door, she saw her daughter going to town with a vibrator. Shocked, she asked, "What on earth are you doing?"
"Mother, I'm thirty-seven years old, unmarried, and this thing is as close as I'm ever going to get to a husband. Now please, just go away and leave me alone," the daughter said.
The following day, the girl's father heard the same buzzing noise coming from the other side of her closed bedroom door. Slowly opening the door, he saw his daughter giving herself a real workout with the vibrator. Taken aback, he asked her what she was doing.
"Dad, I'm thirty-seven years old, unmarried, and this thing is as close as I'm ever going to get to a husband. Now please, just go away and leave me alone," she groaned.
Several days later, the mother came home from a shopping trip and heard that same buzzing more...

As the woman passed her daughter's closed bedroom door, she heard a strange buzzing noise coming from within.
Opening the door, she observed her daughter giving herself a real workout with a vibrator.
Shocked, she asked, "What in the world are you doing?" The daughter replied, "Mom, I'm thirty-five years old, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as I'll ever get to a husband. Please, go away and leave me alone."
The next day, the girl's father heard the same buzz coming from the other side of the closed bedroom door. Upon entering the room, he observed his daughter making passionate love to her vibrator.
To his query as to what she was doing, the daughter said, "Dad, I'm thirty-five years old, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as I'll ever get to a husband. Please, go away and leave me alone."
A couple days later, the wife came home from shopping trip, placed the groceries on the kitchen counter, and heard that buzzing more...

Two mosquitoes were buzzing round when they saw a drunken man. One said to the other, "You bite him? Im driving."

Two male flies are buzzing around, cruising for goodlooking females. One spots a real cutie sitting on apile of cow shit and dives down toward her." Pardon me" he asks, turning on his best charm,"... but is this stool taken?"

Two male flies are buzzing around, cruising for goodlooking females. One spots a real cutie sitting on apile of cow shit and dives down toward her."Pardon me" he asks, turning on his best charm,"...but is this stool taken?"

There was a fly buzzing around a barn one day when he happened on a pile of fresh cow manure.
Due to the fact that it had been hours since his last meal, he flew down and began to eat. He ate and ate and ate.
Finally, he decided he had eaten enough and tried to fly away. He had eaten too much though, and could not get off the ground. As he looked around wondering what to do now, he spotted a pitchfork leaning up against the wall.
He climbed to the top of the handle and jumped off, thinking that once he got airborne, he would be able to take flight. Unfortunately he was wrong and dropped like a rock, splatting when he
hit the floor. Dead.
The moral to the story is:
Never fly off the handle when you're full of shit.

As the woman passed her daughter's closed bedroom door, she heard a strange buzzing noise coming from within. Opening the door, she observed her daughter giving herself a real workout with a vibrator. Shocked, she asked, "What in the world are you doing?"
The daughter replied, "Mom, I'm thirty-five years old, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as I'll ever get to a husband. Please, go away and leave me alone."
The next day, the girl's father heard the same buzz coming from the other side of the closed bedroom door. Upon entering the room, he observed his daughter making passionate love to her vibrator. To his query as to what she was doing, the daughter said, "Dad, I'm thirty-five years old, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as I'll ever get to a husband. Please, go away and leave me alone."
A couple days later, the wife came home from shopping trip, placed the groceries on the kitchen counter, and heard that buzzing noise more...