Astronaut Jokes / Recent Jokes

NASA decided to send a shuttle into space with two monkeys and an astronaut. They trained them for months. Then when they thought they were all ready, they placed all three in the shuttle and got ready to send them up into space. As the moment came closer NASA's mission control center announced, ''This is mission control to Monkey One. Do your stuff.'' At that the first monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the shuttle's engines ignited and the shuttle took off. Two hours later NASA's mission control center announced, ''This is mission control to Monkey Two. Do your stuff.'' At that the second monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the shuttle seperated from the empty fuel tanks. Another two hours later NASA's mission control center announced, ''This is mission control to the astronaut...'' At this the astronaut shouted ''I know, I know. Feed the monkeys and don't touch anything.''

NASA decided to send a shuttle into space with two monkeys and an astronaut. They trained them for months. Then when they thought they were ready, they placed all three in the shuttle and got ready to send them up into space.
As the moment came closer NASA's mission control center announced, "This is mission control to Monkey One. Initiate!"
At that the first monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the shuttle's engines ignited and the shuttle took off.
Two hours later NASA's mission control center announced, "This is mission control to Monkey Two. Initiate!"
At that the second monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the shuttle separated from the empty fuel tanks.
Another two hours later mission control announced, "This is mission control to the astronaut..."
At this the astronaut responded "I know, I know. Feed the monkeys and don't touch anything."

What does an astronaut do when he gets angry? He blasts off:

Which astronaut wears the biggest helmet? The one with the biggest head.

What did the astronaut see on his skillet? Unidentified frying (flying) objects.

Why did the boy become an astronaut? Because he was no earthly good!

I want to be an astronaut when I grow up. What high hopes you have!