Accordion Jokes / Recent Jokes

A drummer, sick of all the drummer jokes, decides to change his instrument. After some thought, he decides on the accordion. So he goes to the music store and says to the owner, "I'd like to look at the accordions, please." The owner gestures to a shelf in the corner and says "All our accordions are over there." After browsing, the drummer says, "I think I'd like the big red one in the corner." The store owner looks at him and says, "You're a drummer, aren't you?" The drummer, crestfallen, says, "How did you know?" The store owner says, "That `big red accordion' is the radiator."

Q: Whats an accordion good for? A: Learning how to fold a map.

If you drop an accordion, a set of bagpipes and a viola off a 20-story building, which one lands first? Who cares?

What's the difference between an Uzi and an accordion? The Uzi stops after 20 rounds.

What's a accordion good for? Learning how to fold a map.

An accordion is a bagpipe with pleats.Q: What is the definition of an optimist? A: An accordion player with a pager.Q: What is the difference between an Uzi and an accordion? A: The Uzi stops after 20 rounds.Q: What do accordion players use as a contraceptive? A: Their personalities. Q: What's the range of an accordion? A: Twenty yards if you've got a good arm! Q: What's a gentleman? A: Somebody who knows how to play the accordion, but doesn't. Q: What's the difference between an onion and an accordion? A: No-one cries when you chop up an accordion. Q: What's the difference between an accordion player and a terrorist? A: Terrorists have sympathisers.Q: What's the definition of perfect pitch? A: When an accordion is thrown down the toilet without it touching the sides. Q: What's the difference between an accordion and a concertina? A: The accordion takes longer to burn. Q: How do you protect a valuable instrument? A: Hide it in an accordion case. Q: What's an accordion good for? A: more...