Willis Jokes / Recent Jokes

It seems a farm boy accidentally overturned his wagon-load of corn. The farmer who lived nearby heard the noise." Hey Willis!!" the farmer yelled. "Forget your troubles. Come in with us. Then I'll help you get the wagon up." "That's mighty nice of you, " Willis answered, "but I don't think Pa would like me to." "Aw, come on," the farmer insisted." Well okay," the boy finally agreed, and added, "but Pa won't like it." After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked his host. "I feel a lot better now, but I know Pa is going to be real upset." "Don't be foolish! " the neighbor said with a smile. "By the way, where is he?" "Under the wagon!"

The Letter D Pulls Out LETTER D PULLS SPONSORSHIP FROM SESAME STREET Noted Consonant Alienated By Controversial New Gay Muppet NEW YORK-A spokesperson for the letter D announced Monday that the consonant is withdrawing sponsorship from Sesame Street following a Children's Television Workshop announcement that a homosexual muppet will soon join the show's cast. "The letter D is proud to have brought you many wonderful Sesame Street episodes throughout the program's 28-year history," said Patricia Willis, public-relations director for D. "But the letter D does not condone the sort of morally questionable lifestyles that Sesame Street is advocating with the introduction of this new character. It can no longer in good conscience associate itself with the show." Willis said D's withdrawal is effective immediately, and applies to both capital and lower-case versions of the letter. The gay muppet, "Bruce," will be introduced on Sesame Street Dec. 23, CTW more...

A farm boy accidentally overturned his wagonload of wheat on the road. The farmer that lived nearby came to investigate. "Hey, Willis," he called out, "forget your troubles for a while and come and have dinner with us. Then I'll help you overturn the wagon.""That's very nice of you," Willis answered, "but I don't think Dad would like me to.""Aw, come on, son!" the farmer insisted."Well, OK," the boy finally agreed, "but Dad won't like it."After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked the host. "I feel a lot better now, but I know Dad's going to be real upset.""Don't be silly!" said the neighbor. "By the way, where is he?""Under the wagon," replied Willis.

Steven Spielberg was discussing his new project - an action docudrama about famous composers starring top movie stars Sylvester Stallone, Steven Segal, Bruce Willis, and Arnold Schwarzenegger were all present. Spielberg strongly desired the box office' oomph' of these superstars, so he was prepared to allow them to select whatever composers they would portray, as long as they were very famous.
"Well," started Stallone, "I've always admired Mozart. I would love to play him."
"Chopin has always been my favorite, and my image would improve if people saw me playing the piano" said Willis. "I'll play him."
"I've always been partial to Strauss and his waltzes," said Segal. "I'd like to play him."
Spielberg was very pleased with these choices. "Sounds splendid." Then, looking at Schwarzenegger, he asked, "Who do you want to be, Arnold?"
So Arnold says, "I'll be Bach."

It seems a farm boy accidentally overturned his wagon load of corn. The farmer who lived nearby heard the noise. "Hey Willis!!" the farmer yelled. "Forget your troubles. Come in with us. Then I'll help you get the wagon up." "That's mighty nice of you, " Willis answered, "but I don't think Pa would like me to." "Aw, come on," the farmer insisted. "Well okay," the boy finally agreed, and added, "But Pa won't like it." After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked his host. "I feel a lot better now, but I know Pa is going to be real upset." "Don't be foolish! " the neighbor said with a smile. "By the way, where is he?" "Under the wagon."

Chuck Norris is what Willis was talking about

The Detroit News reported Saturday that 17 year-old Willis Chen, a senior at Canton High School, received perfect scores on the ACT, the SAT and the PSAT. ACT Inc. spokeswoman Mary Owens says it’s “quite an accomplishment.” The College Board, which administers the SAT and PSAT, says it doesn’t track whether anyone has scored perfectly on both tests. Willis celebrated another outstanding achievement, 17 years and he’s never had a date.