Upside Jokes / Recent Jokes

A blind man was travelling in his private jet, when he felt that something was wrong. He made his way to the cockpit as quickly as possible, but got no response from his pilot.
Fumbling, he found the radio and called the tower. "Help! Help!" he screamed.
The tower came back and asked, "What's the problem?"
"Help me, please!" the blind man yelled. "I'm blind, my pilot is dead, and we're flying upside down!"
"How do you know you're upside down?" the tower controller asked.
"How do I know?" shrieked the blind man. "I know because the shit is running down my back!"

Santa singh was sitting on a tree and singing. Suddenly he turned upside down and again started singing. Banta saw this.
Banta: Why did you turn upside down singing?
Santa: Because now I am singing the'B' side of the cassette.

A blonde saw a "¿" on her computer screen and asked another blonde, "How do you do that?" She replied. . . "Simple, turn the keyboard upside down!"

Q: Why are swedish lighthouses upside down? A: Because they want to show the submarines the way.

Confucius say...
Woman who cooks beans and peas in same pot very unsanitary.
Man who fart in church sit in own pew.
Baseball very funny game-man with 4 balls no can walk!!
Woman who dance while wearing jock strap have make believe ballroom.
Man who fly plane upside down have crackup.
Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.
Woman who ride bicycle in city pedal ass all over town.
Secretary not permanent, till screwed on desk.
A girl's best asset is her 'lie'ability.
Support bacteria - it's the only culture some people have!
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Man who eat jellybean fart in technicolor.
Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake with smelly finger.
Baby conceived on back seat of car with automatic transmission grow up to be shiftless bastard.
Boy who go to bed with sex problem wake up with solution in hand.
Kotex not best thing on earth, but next to best thing.
Man who marries a girl with no bust has more...

Confucius say...

Woman who cooks beans and peas in same pot very unsanitary.
Man who fart in church sit in own pew.
Baseball very funny game--man with 4 balls no can walk!!
Woman who dance while wearing jock strap have make believe ballroom.
Man who fly plane upside down have crackup.
Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day.
Woman who ride bicycle in city pedal ass all over town.
Secretary not permanent, till screwed on desk.
A girl's best asset is her' lie'ability.
Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have!
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Man who eat jellybean fart in technicolor.
Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake with smelly finger.
Baby conceived on back seat of car with automatic transmission grow up to be shiftless bastard.
Boy who go to bed with sex problem wake up with solution in hand.
Kotex not best thing on earth, but next to best thing.
Man who marries a more...

A bloke goes into a pub.
The barmaid asks what he wants.
'I want to put my head between your tits, and lick the sweat off,' he replies.
'You dirty bastard!' shouts the barmaid, 'Get out before I get my husband.'
The bloke apologizes and says he will never do it again.
The barmaid, disgusted, accepts his apology and asks what he wants again.
'I want to pull down your knickers, spread cottage cheese between your arse cheeks and lick it off,' he replies.
'What???' screams the barmaid, 'That's it! You're barred, you dirty, filthy, perverted bastard, get out now.'
Once again the bloke apologizes, and says he will never, ever do it again.
'Right. I'll give you one last chance,' says the barmaid. 'Now, what do you want?'
'I want to turn you upside down, fill your pussy with Guinness and drink it all out of you.'
The barmaid starts crying and runs upstairs to her husband, who is sitting down watching the telly.
'What's up, love?' says the more...