Spoons Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Restaurant Efficiency

    Hot 7 years ago

    A couple seated in a Chicago restaurant noticed that all the waiters carried two spoons in their vest pocket. Curious, the man asked their waiter the reason for this.
    "Well, sir," the waiter explained, "an efficiency study conducted by management determined that the most frequently dropped silverware item is a spoon. Therefore, all waiters carry two spoons so that the item can be instantly replaced."
    As the waiter was offering the explanation to the couple, they noticed there was a string hanging out of the fly of his pants. "What about that?" the man asked, discreetly pointing to the string.
    "That, sir, is the result of another efficiency study," the waiter replied. "When we need to go to the bathroom, we use the string to pull ourselves out and aim. Therefore, we do not have to stop to wash our hands."
    "We understand how you can get yourself out and aim," the man said, "but how do you go about getting more...

    A little corporate humor

    Hot 6 years ago

    A little corporate humor
    I took some friends out to dinner last week, and I noticed a spoon in the shirt pocket of our waiter as he handed us the menus. It seemed a little odd, but I dismissed it as a random thing. Until our busboy came with water & tableware; he too, sported a spoon in his breast pocket. I looked around the room, and all the waiters, waitresses, busboys, etc. had spoons in their pockets.When our waiter returned to take our order, I just had to ask, "Why the spoons?""Well," he explained, "our parent company recently hired some AndersenConsulting efficiency experts to review all our procedures, and aftermonths of statistical analyses, they concluded that our patrons dropspoons on the floor 73% more often than any other utensil; at a frequency of 3 spoons per hour per workstation. By preparing all our workers for this contingency in advance, we can cut our trips to the kitchen down and save time...nearly 1.5 extra man-hours per shift. Just more...

    Mind your Manners

    Hot 5 years ago

    (An amusing anecdote from the Jan 26 San Jose Mercury News.)
    Nearly everyone knows that Judith Martin, better known as Miss
    Manners, the syndicated columnist, is exceedingly correct. Last
    week, she saw an advertisement in the newspaper that a Maryland
    jewelry store was having a sale in her silver pattern. Upon arriving
    at the store, she told the jeweler she was looking for additional
    dessert spoons in her pattern and had been making do with the larger
    soup spoons.
    "That's not much of a hardship," the employee said. "It is
    for me," Martin responded. Caught up in the moment, the saleswoman
    joked, "Who do you think you are, Miss Manners?" The easily
    recognizable Miss Manners looked at the woman, unable to respond. And
    then it registered. "Oh my God!" the saleswoman said.

    Two Spoons

    Hot 3 years ago

    At a restaurant, one of the customers noticed that all of the waiters had two spoons in their vest pockets. Upon being asked, one waiter said, "We see that the most frequently dropped silverware are spoons, therefore we keep them for replacement."
    Then the customer noticed that a string was hanging out of all the waiters' flies and asked what the string was for. "The string is for us to go to the bathroom," explained the waiter, "that way, when we pull it, it shoots and aims right away. Then we don't have to stop to wash our hands."
    The customer asked, "Well, that's how you get it out, but how do you get it back in?"
    The waiter whispered confidentially, "I don't know about the others, but I use the two spoons."

    At a restaurant, one of the customers noticed that all of the waiters had two spoons in their vest pockets. Upon being asked, one waiter said, "We see that the most frequently dropped silverware are spoons, therefore we keep them for replacement."
    Then the customer noticed that a string was hanging out of all the waiters' flies and asked what the string was for. "The string is for us to go to the bathroom," explained the waiter, "that way, when we pull it, it shoots and aims right away. Then we don't have to stop to wash our hands."
    The customer asked, "Well, that's how you get it out, but how do you get it back in?"
    The waiter whispered confidentially, "I don't know about the others, but I use the two spoons."

  • Recent Activity