Republican Jokes / Recent Jokes

President Bush arrives in the "States of America" helicopter-after learning that Alaska and Hawaii aren't connected.

President Bush is vowing he will not back down in his support for UN Ambassador John Bolton. Having heard that, Bolton’s already packing up his office.

Amid allegations he snorted crystal meth and cavorted with a male prostitute, evangelical leader Ted Haggard is entering “spiritual rehab.” It was either that, or the West Hollywood samba competition.

A Kansas woman who lost her voice nearly three years ago, suddenly started talking again. Doctors were stunned; her husband was pissed.

SarahPalin is publishing her memoirs entitled "Going Rogue." It contains aspecial section with color by numbers pages in the back, featuringRussia and her house.

Due to the recent terror plot, President Bush reassured the American people, "This country is safer than it was prior to 9-11 not just because we now have a terror alert system, but because the terrorists also have two less targets."

Did you hear Sarah Palin named her kid with Down Syndrome “Trig”? Yeah, like that kid's ever gonna be able to do math. That's just cruel. What?! Are you going to have a kid in a wheelchair and name him Walker?!

Sarah Palin compared hockey moms to pit bulls, saying the difference is that "one wears lipstick". While hockey moms may wear lipstick, pit bulls rarely let their offspring get pounded without some protection.

The Republican National Committee announced today that the Republican Party is changing its emblem from an elephant to a condom.
The committee chairman explained that the condom more clearly reflects the party's stance today, because a condom accepts inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a
sense of security while you're actually getting screwed.