Proud Jokes / Recent Jokes

A young woman goes into the doctor's office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a red "H" on her chest. "How did you get that mark on your chest?" asks the doctor. "Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Harvard sweatshirt, even when we make love," she replies.

A couple of days later, another young woman comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a blue "Y" on her chest. "How did you get that mark on your chest?" asks the doctor. "Oh, my boyfriend went to Yale and he's so proud of it that he never takes off his Yale sweatshirt, even when we make love," she replies.

A couple of days later, another young woman comes in for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a green "M" on her chest. "Do you have a boyfriend at Michigan?" asks the doctor.

"No, but I have a girlfriend at more...

There is an Old Irish couple, Margaret and Patty. Margaret walks into the living room where Patty is and says, "Patrick, oh I am so proud of you, so proud. Last month, I told you that you were spending too much time at the pub and too much time away from me. Since then you haven't gone to the pub once and stayed home. I want to do something special for ya, I want to make ya a special dinner, special indeed." Patty replied, "Oh Margaret, you don't have to do that, don't trouble yourself." "No, it's no trouble" Margaret insisted, "In fact, when we were on holiday last year, you really enjoyed that Escargot. You go to the store and get them snails and I'll make' em up for ya." Patty got excited, "Oh, that would be wonderful!! O. K., o. k. I'll go right away."

So Patty goes to the store to get the snails, but has to pass the pub on the way. As he passes, everyone in the pub starts yelling, "Hey Patty!! Where ya been, Boy? more...

In a recent video, John McCain said that he was proud of Sarah Palin. Maybe that's why he isn't President.

There were three guys that were golfing. Right away one of them ran to the bathroom. So, the other two started talking about how proud they are of their sons. The first guy said I am so proud of my son that last night he sold a million-dollar house. Well said the other guy, last night my son sold a million-dollar ferari.Then the other guy came back and asked what they were talking about. They sais their sons. So he said my son is a male-stripper and last night he bought a million dollar house and a million dollar ferari.

A man has six children and is overly proud of his achievement. So proud, in fact, that in spite of his wife's objections, he begins to call her "Mother of Six".
While they are at a party one evening, he decides that it is time to leave and wants to find out if his wife is ready to go as well. Shouting at the top of his lungs, he says "Mother of Six, shall we go home?"
Infuriated by her husband's lack of discretion, he wife shouts back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four!"

A Texan bought a round of drinks for all in the bar and said that his wife had just produced "a typical Texas baby" weighing twenty pounds. Two weeks later he returned to the bar. The bartender recognized him and asked, "Aren't you the father of the typical Texas baby that weighed twenty pounds at birth?" "Yup, shore am!" "How much does he weigh now?" The proud father answered, "Ten pounds." The bartender said, "Why, what happened? He did weigh twenty pounds." The proud Texas father said, "Jest had him circumcised!"

A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself that he starts calling his wife "Mother of Six" in spite of her objections.
One night they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home, and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home, Mother of Six?"
His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion shouts back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four!"