Native Jokes / Recent Jokes

A Missionary went to what he thought was an totally uninhabited island. He discovered that there were indeed people there, but the inhabitants of the island knew nothing of civilized culture.The missionary decided that it would be in the natives best interest if he could teach them about civilization. He created small schools in huts and taught the natives how to read and write and do mathmetics.He would take the natives one by one around the island, and teach them the correct words for objects that they would see. One day, the Missionary is walking around the island with one of the natives.They walk past a tree. The Missionary points and says to the native, "Tree".The native repeats, "Tree".They continue further and come to a bush. The Missionary points to it and says, "Bush".The native repeats the word, "Bush".They walk around the bush - and lying on the ground behind it, is a native couple whoopi. The Missionary hopes that the native won't more...

Traveling outside Taos, a man comes upon a Native American lying in the middle of the road with his ear pressed against the blacktop. "What are you doing?" asks the man.

The tribesman replies, "Woman, late 30s, three kids, one barking dog in late model, four-door station wagon, traveling at 65 mph."

"Amazing! You can tell all of that just by listening to the ground?"

"No," says the Native American. "They ran over me five minutes ago."

This one was told to me by my penpal Mary Ellen Duff, to whom
it was told by some enigmatic fellow named Dave...
An ignorant but well-meaning tourist was visiting a small
Polynesian island when he came across a native man proudly
displaying twenty alligator teeth slung about his neck in
a decorative fashion.
"I guess you must prize alligator teeth the way we value
pearls," said the tourist.
"More so," said the native. "Anyone can open up an oyster."

Here's one...
There was this priest who wanted to "spread the good word" in areas
where need was greatest. He thought that the best place to start was
in Africa. So off he went.
He went into a deep jungle, and found a tribe. In his haste, he
forgot that he would have to teach these people English first. So,
he selected what he thought was the smartest of the tribesmen and
began his teaching.
They went for long walks in the jungle, first the priest would point
to a rock and say, "Rock." And the native would say "bagwundame."
And the priest would repeat "Rock," and the native would say "roock."
Then priest would point and say "tree," native would say "tree,"
and so on-Until the native had a minor understanding of English.
It was on one of these "nature walks" that the pair stumbled upon a
clearing, and on the other edge of the clearing was a young more...

Q: How many Canadians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Twelve. Four to form a Parliamentary study committee to decide how to solve the problem, one Francophone to complain that I didnt translate this joke into French, one Native Canadian to protest that the interests of Native Canadians have been overlooked, one woman from the National Action Committee On the Status Of Women to say that women have been underrepresented in the process, one to go over the border to the Niagara Falls Factory Outlet Mall and buy a new bulb and not pay duty on it on the way back, one to actually screw it in, one to collect taxes on the whole procedure so the government can afford it, one to buy a case of Molson for everybody to drink, and one to drop the puck.

What do you get when you take a native Alaskan and divide itscircumference by its diameter? Eskimo pi.

Some years ago, on Times Square in NYC, I observed a native American, in full Indian regalia, feather head dress, buckskin clothes, etc. As a pretty woman would walk by, he would raise his right hand, in an Indian greeting, and say " Wanna ". I watched this ritual for about 20 minutes, and I became more curious as he kept making these greetings. Finally, I couldn't resist any longer. I went up to the native American, and said, "I have been watching you, and I am confused. I thought that Indians say "How "He turned to me, obviously quite annoyed, and said..."ME KNOW HOW... ME TRYING TO FIND WOMAN WHO WANNA!!"