Mistletoe Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    It was a few days before Christmas. The trip went reasonably well, and he was ready to go back home. The airport on the other end had turned a tacky red and green, and loudspeakers blared annoying elevator renditions of cherished Christmas carols. Being someone who took Christmas very seriously, and being slightly tired, he was not in a particularly good mood. (Almost a scrooge) Going to check in his luggage (which, for some reason, had become one suitcase with entirely new clothes), he saw hanging mistletoe. Not real mistletoe, but very cheap plastic with red paint on some of the rounder parts and green paint on some of the flatter and pointer parts, that could be taken for mistletoe only in a very Picasso sort of way. With a considerable degree of irritation and nowhere else to vent it, he said to the attendant, "Even if we were married, I would not want to kiss you under such a ghastly mockery of mistletoe." "Sir, look more closely at where the mistletoe is." more...

    It was slightly before Christmas. The trip went reasonably well, and he was ready to go back. The airport on the other end had turned a tacky red and green, and loudspeakers blared annoying elevator renditions of cherished Christmas carols.
    Being someone who took Christmas very seriously, and being slightly tired, he was not in a particularly good mood.
    Going to check in his luggage (which, for some reason, had become one suitcase with entirely new clothes), he saw hanging mistletoe. Not real mistletoe, but very cheap plastic with red paint on some of the rounder parts and green paint on some of the flatter and pointier parts, that could be taken for mistletoe only in a very Picasso sort of way.
    With a considerable degree of irritation and nowhere else to vent it, he said to the attendant,
    "Even if I were not married, I would not want to kiss you under such a ghastly mockery of mistletoe."
    "Sir, look more closely at where the mistletoe more...

    It was the beginning of December. The trip had gone reasonably well, and he was ready to go back. The airport on the other hand had turned a tacky red and green, and loudspeakers blared annoying elevator renditions of cherished Christmas carols.Being someone who took Christmas very seriously, and being slightly tired, he was not in a particularly good mood.Going to check in his luggage (which, for some reason, had become one suitcase with entirely new clothes), he saw hanging mistletoe. Not real mistletoe, but very cheap plastic with red paint on some of the rounder parts and green paint on some of the flatter and "pointier" parts, that could be taken for mistletoe only in a very Picasso sort of way.With a considerable degree of irritation and nowhere else to vent it, he said to the lady attendant, "Even if I were not married, I would not want to kiss you under such a ghastly mockery of mistletoe.""Sir, look more closely at where the mistletoe more...

    You stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.

    It was slightly before Thanksgiving. The trip went reasonably
    well, and I was ready to go back. The airport on the other end
    had turned a tacky red and green, and loudspeakers blared annoying
    elevator renditions of cherished Christmas carols. Being someone
    who took Christmas very seriously, and being slightly tired, I
    was not in a particularly good mood.

    Going to check in my luggage (which, for some reason, had become
    one suitcase with entirely new clothes), I saw hanging mistletoe.
    Not real mistletoe, but very cheap plastic with red paint on some
    of the rounder parts and green paint on some of the flatter and
    pointier parts, that could be taken for mistletoe only in a very
    Picasso sort of way.

    With a considerable degree of irritation and nowhere else to vent
    it, I said to the attendant, "Even if I were not married, I
    would not want to kiss you under such a ghastly mockery more...

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