Minnesota Jokes

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    Sven and Olie

    Hot 1 year ago

    Sven and Olie died and went to Hell. After awhile, the Devil came by to see how his new guests were doing. To his amazement, he found Sven and Olie were still wearing their winter gear and seemed to be quite comfortable. The Devil asked why they weren't hot.
    Olie replied, "We come from Minnesota where it's always cold. This is feeling pretty good to us." This upset the Devil, so he turned up the thermostat. Awhile later the Devil looked in again on Sven and Olie. To his surprise he found they were still wearing their winter gear. The Devil questioned them on it again. "You have to remember that we are from Minnesota and it's very, very cold there. This is feeling nice to us."
    The Devil was even madder at this, so he turned the thermostat all the way up to maximum temperature. The Devil waited some time and then went back to Sven and Olie. This time he found they had only unzipped their coats, but still had all their winter clothes on. The Devil couldn't more...

    New Salesman

    Hot 3 years ago

    A young man from Minnesota moves to Florida and goes to a big "everything under one roof" department store looking for a job.

    The Manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?" The kid says "Yeah. I was a salesman back in Minnesota. "

    Well, the boss liked the kid and gave him the job. "You start tomorrow. I'll come down after we close and see how you did."

    His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it. After the store was locked up, the boss came down. "How many customers bought something from you today?"

    The kid says "One".

    The boss says "Just One? Our sales people average 20 to 30 customers a day. How much was the sale for?"

    The kid says "$101, 237.65".

    The boss says "$101,237.65? What the heck did you sell?"

    The kid says, "First, I sold him a small fish hook. Then I sold hi m a medium more...

    Lake County, Minn.
    Residents of Lake Coubnty, Minn. are thumbing their noses at a Minnesota state law mandating that they rename Squaw Creek and Squaw Bay to something less offensive.
    Many of the state's 55,000 American Indians find the the word "squaw" historically used to describe an American Indian woman, to be an obscenity, according to a story in the New York Times.
    Other Minnesota counties complied with the renaming law. Squaw was removed from the names of 19 sites - creeks ponds, and lakes, etc,
    Not Lake County. They said there is nothing offensive in the term "squaw". The issue, they said, is whether local representation will rule or state bureaucracy.
    Meanwhile in protest, they offered to rename the bodies of water Politically Correct Creek and Politically Correct Bay.
    Source: Houston Chronicle

    Sven and Ole are visiting a relative in Texas. While walking along the street, they see a sign on a store front which reads:
    Suits $5.00 each
    Shirts $2.00 each
    Trousers $2.50 per pair
    Sven says to his pal, "Hey Ole! We could buy a whole lot of dem and ven ve get back to Minnesota, ve could sell them and make a fortune."
    "Now ven ve go into the shop, yust let me do all da talkin' cause if dey hear your Minnesota accent dey might tink ve are dumb Norwegians and try ta raise da price. But, I can speak with a perfect Texas drawl."
    They go in, and Sven drawls out an order of 50 suits at $5.00 each, 100 shirts at $2.00 each and 50 pair of trousers at $2.50 each.
    The owner of the shop says "You're Norwegians from Minnesota, aren't you?"
    "Uff Da!" Says a surprised Sven. "How'd you know dat?"
    The owner says, "Because this is a dry-cleaners."

    The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.St. Paul, Minnesota:For people with lots on their agenda, Minnesota Mining & Manufacturing Company creates 25-inch-by-30-inch Post-It Easel Pads.

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