Maxwell Jokes / Recent Jokes

A mother had three daughters and on their wedding, she tells each one of them to write back about their marriage life. And the first one gets married.... The second day the letter arrives with a single message. .. simply: "Maxwell House Coffee!" Mother got confused and finally noticed a Maxwell House ad: "Satisfaction to the last drop...". So, Mother is happy. Then the second daughter gets married. Only after a week was there a message that reads; "Rothmans". So the Mother looks into the Rothmans ad, and it says; "LIFE SIZE, KING SIZE". And Mother is again happy. Then it was the third one's wedding. Mother was anxious. Finally, after 4 weeks came the message; "BRITISH AIRWAYS". Mother looks into the BA ad, but fainted, "TWO TIMES A DAY, FOUR TIMES A WEEK, BOTH WAYS."

When Mr Maxwell's wife left him, he couldn't sleep. Why was that? She had taken the bed.

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Maxwell!
Maxwell who?
Maxwell call later if your not going to answer!

With the World Cup 2007 coming up shortly, you will find more cricket related features on my site.
Yorkshire 232 all out, Hutton ill - I'm sorry, Hutton 111. - John Snagge, BBC News
He's usually a good puller - but he couldn't get it up that time. - Richie Benaud, Channel 9
In the back of Hughes' mind must be the thought that he will dance down the piss and mitch one. - Tony Greig, Channel 9
It was close for Zaheer, Lawson threw his hands in the air and Marsh threw his head in the air.- Jack Potter, 3UZ
Chappell just stood on his feet and smashed it to the boundary. - Jim Maxwell, ABC Radio
I think we are all slightly down in the dumps after another loss. We may be in the wrong sign... Venus may be in the wrong juxtaposition with somewhere else. - Ted Dexter, explaining away England's seventh successive Test loss, to Australia at Lord's, 1993
Playing against a team with Ian Chappell as a captain turns cricket match into gang warfare. - Mike Brearley, more...

A mother had three daughters and at their weddings she asked them to write home and tell her about their married life.
The first wrote back on the second day. The letter arrived with a single message: 'Maxwell Coffeehouse.' The mother was confused but finally noticed a Maxwell coffee ad, and it said, 'Satisfaction to the last drop...' So the mother was happy.
Then the second daughter got married and after a week she sent home her reply. The message read: 'Rothmans.' So the mother looked for the Rothmans ad, and it said, 'LIFE SIZE, KING SIZE.' And the mother was happy.
Then it was the third one's wedding. The mother was anxious. It took four weeks for a message to come through. When it did the message was simply: 'BRITISH AIRWAYS.'
The mother was so concerned. She frantically went through all the newspapers at home looking for a BA ad. When she found one she fainted.
The ad read: 'TWO TIMES A DAY, SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, BOTH WAYS.'

Mrs. Smith has three daughters who are all getting married within the same month. She tells each one of her daughters to write back about their married life.

To avoid possible embarrassment to their new husbands by openly discussing their love lives, the mother and daughters agree to using newspaper advertisements as a "code" to let the mother know how their love lives are going.

The first one gets married and the second day a telegram arrives with a single message, simply: "MAXWELL COFFEE HOUSE."

Mrs. Smith gets the newspaper and checks the Maxwell Coffee House advertisement, and it says: "Good to the last drop..." So, Mrs. Smith is happy.

Then the second daughter gets married. After a week, there is a postcard that reads: "ROTHMAN'S MATTRESSES." So, Mrs. Smith looks at the Rothman's Mattresses ad, and it says: "FULL SIZE, KING SIZE." And Mrs. Smith is happy.

Then it is the third more...

A Mother had three daughters and on their weddings, she tells each one of them
to write back about their marriage life.
And the first one gets married. The second day the letter arrives with a single
message... simply, "Maxwell Coffeehouse." Mother got confused and finally
noticed in a Maxwell, and it says, "Satisfaction to the last drop..." So, Mother
is happy.
Then the second daughter gets married. Only after a week was there a message
that reads, "Rothmans." So the Mother looks into the Rothmans ad, and it says,
"Life Size, King Size." And Mother is happy.
Then it was the third one's wedding. Mother was anxious. Only after four weeks
came the message, "British Airways." And Mother looks into the BA ad, but this
time she fainted. The ad reads, "Two times a day, four times a week, both ways."