Juice Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Why is lemon juice made

    Hot 3 weeks ago

    Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made
    with real lemons?

    The best fruit cake ever

    Hot 6 months ago

    1 cup butter
    1 cup sugar
    4 large eggs
    1 cup dried fruit
    1 tsp baking powder
    lemon juice
    1 cup brown sugar
    nuts
    1 or 2 bottles scotch whiskey
    Before you start, sample the scotch to check quality. Good isn't it? Now start baking.
    Select a large misking bowl, measuring cup etc.
    Check the scotch again, as it must be just right.
    To be sure that the scotch is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink it as fast as you can. Repeat.
    With an electric mixer, beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
    And one teaspoon of thugar and beat again.
    Meanwhile, make sure the scotch is still OK.
    Cry another cup.
    Open second bottle if necessary.
    Ant tow large leggs, 2 cups dried fruit and beat till high.
    If druit gets stuck in beaters, just pry loose with drewscriver.
    Next, sift three cups of salt or anything, it really doesn't matter.
    Sample scotch again.
    Sift half cup of lemon juice.
    Fold in more...

    Orange Juice

    Hot 1 year ago

    You might be a redneck if you stare at the orange juice container because it says concentrate on it!

    Christmas Cake Recipe

    Hot 5 months ago

    CHRISTMAS CAKE RECIPE You'll need the following: 1 cup of water
    1 cup of sugar
    4 large brown eggs
    2 cups of dried fruit
    1 teaspoon of salt
    1 cup of brown sugar
    Lemon juice
    Nuts
    1 bottle of whisky
    Sample the whisky to check for quality. Take a large bowl. Check the whisky again. To be sure it's the
    highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer, beat one cup of butter
    in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar and beat again. Make sure the whisky is still OK.
    Cry another tup. Tune up the mixer. Beat two leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried
    fruit. Mix on the turner. If the fired druit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it goose with a drewscriver.
    Sample the whisky to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. Who cares?
    Check the whisky. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Spoon the sugar or something. Whatever you can more...

    Fruit Cake Recipe
    1 c water
    1 c butter
    4 lg. eggs
    1 btl WHISKEY
    8 oz mixed nuts
    1 tsp. salt
    juice of one lemon
    1 c brown sugar
    2 c dried fruit
    1 tsp baking powder
    Sample whiskey to check quality. Take a large bowl. Re-sample whiskey to ensure it is of the highest quality. Pour one cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on electric mixer, beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one tsp. of sugar and beat again. Make sure whiskey is still okay. Cry another tup. Turn on the mixerer. Break two eggs and add to the bowl, chuck in the dried fruit. Mix on the turner. If fried druit gets stuck in beaterers, pry loos with a drewscriver. Sample whiskey to check for tonsiscency. Next sift two cups of salt...or something...who cares? Check whiskey again. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Spoon. Of sugar or something. Whatever you can find. Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees. Don't forget to beat off the more...

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