Gee Jokes / Recent Jokes

A cop pulls Jenna Bush over for speeding and he notices her eyes are red.

He says, "Gee, your eyes look red. Have you been drinking?"

Jenna replies, "No officer, but gee, your eyes look glazed. Have you been eating doughnuts?

The top 20 things not to say to a cop when he pulls you over. 20. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. 19. Sorry officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in. 18. Aren't you the guy from the villiage people? 17. Hey, you must have been doing 125 to keep up with me, good job. 16. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical shape to be a police officer. 15. I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead. 14. Bad cop. No donut. 13. You're not going to check the trunk, are you? 12. Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence. 11. Didn't I see you get your butt kicked on cops? 10. Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonalds? 9. I pay your salary8. So uh, you on the take or what? 7. Gee officer, that's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning. 6. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does. 5. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there is no other more...

I can’t reach my license unless you hold my beer.
Sorry, Officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in.
Aren’t you the guy from the Village People?
Hey, you must’ve been doing about 125 mph to keep up with me! Good Job!
I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.
Bad cop! No doughnut!
You’re not gonna check the trunk, are you?
Gee, that gut sure doesn’t inspire confidence.
Didn’t I see you get your butt kicked on Cops?
Wow, you look just like the guy in the picture on my girlfriend’s nightstand.
Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonald’s?
I pay your salary!
So, uh, you on the take or what?
Gee, Officer! That’s terrific! The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us more...

The ABSOLUTE WORST things to say to a Police Officer
- I can`t reach my license unless you hold my beer.
- That uniform makes your butt look really big.
- Your not gonna check the trunk, are you?
- Didn`t I see you get your ass kicked on Cops?
- I bet I could grab that gun before you finish writing my ticket.
- And that hooker I met at the AIDS clinic said you were a nice guy.
- Hey, you must`ve been doin` about 125 mph to keep up with me! Good
job!
- I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a
Police Officer.
- I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.
- Bad Cop! No Donut!
- Gee, that gut sure doesn`t inspire confidence.
- Wow, You look just like the guy in the picture on my girlfriend`s
night stand...
- When you smack the crap outta me, make sure you smile pretty for the
camcorder.
- Is it true that people become cops because they are too more...

The top 20 things not to say to a cop when he pulls you over.

20. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.

19. Sorry officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

18. Aren't you the guy from the villiage people?

17. Hey, you must have been doing 125 to keep up with me, good job.

16. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical shape to be a police officer.

15. I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.

14. Bad cop. No donut.

13. You're not going to check the trunk, are you?

12. Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence.

11. Didn't I see you get your butt kicked on cops?

10. Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonalds?

9. I pay your salary

8. So uh, you on the take or what?

7. Gee officer, that's terrific. The last officer only gave more...