Joe, a college student, was taking a course in ornithology, the study of birds. The night before the biggest test of the semester, Joe spent all night studying. He had the textbook nearly memorized. He knew his class notes backward and forward. Joe was ready.The morning of the test, Joe entered the auditorium and took a seat in the front row. On the table in the front was a row of ten stuffed birds. Each bird had a sack covering its body, and only the legs were showing. When class started, the professor announced that the students were to identify each bird by looking at its legs and give its common name, species, habitat, mating habits, etc.
Joe looked at each of the birds' legs. They all looked the same to him. He started to get angry. He had stayed up all night studying for this test and now he had to identify birds by their LEGS? The more he thought about the situation, the angrier he got.Finally he reached his boiling point. He stood up, marched up to the professor's desk, more...
The Professor Of A Graduate-School Class Of Gifted Students Included A Huge Amount Of Material On The Midterm Exam.
Tension In The Room Built, People Were Sighing And Gasping Aloud As They Realized How Much Material They Had Covered And Were Expected To Recall.
The Following Week The Professor Tossed The Graded Papers On Her Desk And Announced, "Class, After I Left Here Last Week, The Lord Spoke To Me. He Said,' Thanks, Professor. I Haven't Heard From Some Of Those People In Years!'"
Story of a Physics student who got the following question in an exam:
"You are given an accurate barometer, how would you use it to determine the height of a skyscraper? "
He answered: "Go to the top floor, tie a long piece of string to the barometer, let it down' till it touches the ground and measure the length of the string".
The examiner wasn't satisfied, so they decided to interview the guy:
"Can you give us another method, one which demonstrates your knowledge of Physics? "
"Sure, go to the top floor, drop the barometer off, and measure how long before it hits the ground......"
"Not, quite what we wanted, care to try again? "
"Make a pendulum of the barometer, measure its period at the bottom, then measure its period at the top......"
"..another try? ...."
"Measure the length of the barometer, then mount it more...
There are five men who are studying to become priests.
They have gone through 1 year of training and are ready for their finnal exam.
For the final exam the head priest decides that the students would have to stand in a field with a bell atached to their penis while a naked lady pranced in front of them.
the first four priest pass fine, but the fith one got an erection so fast and so big that the bell broke off.
Embaressed he bent down to pick up the broken bell and suddenly 4 other bells could be heard ringing.
1 A dumb blonde was bragging about her knowledge of the state capitals of the United States. She proudly announced, "Go ahead, ask me any of the capitals, I know all of them."
A red head said, "O.K., what's the capital of Wyoming?" The blonde replied, "Oh, that's easy, 'W'."
2 A blonde was telling her priest a Polack joke, when halfway through the priest interrupts her, "Don't you know I'm Polish?"
"Oh, I'm sorry," the blonde apologizes, "do you want me to start over and talk slower?"
3 A dumb blonde was standing in front of a soda machine outside of a local store. After putting in sixty cents, a root beer popped out of the machine. She set it on the ground, put sixty more cents into the machine, and pushes another button; suddenly, a coke comes out the machine!
She continued to do this until a man waiting to use the machine became impatient. "Excuse me, can I get my soda and then you can go back to more...