Efficient Jokes / Recent Jokes

Three engineers were in the bathroom standing at the urinals. The first engineer finished and walked over to the sink to wash his hands. He then proceeded to dry his hands very carefully. He used paper towel after paper towel and ensured that every single spot of water on his hands was dried.
Turning to the other two engineers, he said, `At Wipro, we are trained to be extremely thorough.`
The second engineer finished his task at the urinal and he proceeded to wash his hands. He used a single paper towel and made sure that he dried his hands using every available portion of the paper towel.
He turned and said, `At TCS, not only are we trained to be extremely thorough, but we are also trained to be extremely efficient.`
The third engineer finished and walked straight for the door, shouting over his shoulder, `At INFY we don`t pee on our hands.`

Prelude:
Here it is! The REAL Windows FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions) Version 4. 2e! The authors are still searching for more Windows/Microsoft/Bill Gates related experiences, short stories, origins and other jokes. Please send them to the support site mentioned at the end of this document.

01. Novice-Question: How do I recognize Windows?
If your screen is invaded by countless silly little icons no one is able to understand, if your computers speed is reduced to almost zero, if your hard disk is full, if you can't start your normal programs anymore, then indeed you have made the fatal mistake of acquiring Microsoft Windows!
02. Virgin-Questions: What exactly is Windows? Why do I need Windows?
Windows is a form of modern warfare. It's yet another attempt of the electronics industry to rape and destroy the minds of its unsuspecting victims. And of course you don't need Windows. It needs you. Bill Gates needs you to buy it to get even more rich and more...

Santa comes home with his little daughter, whom he has just taken to work.
The little girl asks, "Daddy, I saw you in your office with your secretary. Why do you call her a doll?"
Feeling his wife, Jeeto's gaze upon him, Santa explains, "Well, honey, my secretary is a very hard-working girl. She types like you wouldn't believe, she knows the computer system, and is very efficient."
"Oh," says the little girl, "I thought it was because she closed her eyes when you lay her down on the couch."

After the micro surgeons conference in New York, the leading surgeons were in
a bar and, being drunk off there faces, began to reminice over their greatest
feats
The first, and English surgeon explained:
We had a chap caught in a printing press factory last year and all that was
left of
him was his little finger. Our team of surgeons constructed a new hand and
buit a
new arm, enigeered a new body and ultimately, he returned to the work
force. He
was so efficient he put five men out of work.
"Thats nothing." added the American surgeon. "We had a worker trapped inside
a
nuclear reactor and all that was left of him was an eyelash. We constructed
a new eye, a new skull, a new torso and new limbs. We put him back into the
workforce in under a week and he is so efficient he put 50 men out of work.
The Canadian surgeon, not to be outdone:
"I was walking down the street one day when a Fart more...

A recent NASA study found that supermassive black holes, located at the center of some galaxies, are the most fuel efficient engines in the universe. "If car engines were as efficient as these black holes, you could get a billion miles out of a gallon of gas," said a study team leader. NASA officials refused to give any further details on their finding stating that they “do not want to give the President any more retarded ideas.”