Dummy Jokes / Recent Jokes

Amnesia: Condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to have sex again.
Dumbwaiter: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
Family Planning: The art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster.
Feedback: The inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots.
Full Name: What you call your child when you are angry with him/her.
Grandparents: The people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right.
Hearsay: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
Impregnable: A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.
Independent: How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.
Ow: The first word spoken by children with older siblings.
Pre-natal: When your life was still somewhat your own.
Puddle: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into more...

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Dummy!
Dummy who?
Dummy a favour and go away!

"Isn`t the principal a dummy!" said a boy to a girl. "Well, do you know who I am?" asked the girl. "No." replied the boy. "I`m the principal`s daughter." said the girl. "And do you know who I am?" asked the boy. "No," she replied. "Thank goodness!" said the boy with a sign of relief.

"Isn't the principal a dummy!" said a boy to a girl. "Say, do you know who I am?" asked the girl. "No." "I'm the principal's daughter." "And do you know who I am?" asked the boy. "No," she replied. "Thank goodness!"

Your Momma is so dummy when she went to Family Dollar she said heres my family where is my dollar.

1.If you come to a fork in the road, take it!...Yogi Berra

2.Life's like a Kit-Kat Bar: Gimmie a break...Sean Ryan

3.I went to the store to buy camouflage pants, but I couldn't find them...Sean Ryan

3.If you ever fall off the Space Needle, just go real limp, because people on the ground will think you're a dummy, and they'll try to catch you, because, hey, free dummy...Jack Handey

4.Probably the earliest fly swatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to a long stick...Jack Handey

Anonymous quotes

5.Hmmm....why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?

6.Yeah...and pay on freeways?

7.You can't have manslaughter without laughter.

Their was a Sri Lankan Association formed in a foreign country. Many people tried to become the President but one succeeded not because of his qualifications, his street smartness. to get things moving and raise some funds for the association the president purposed a dinner dance to be organizes. so the committee proposed with a music group from Sri Lanka in a five star hotel with Rafael draws and printing souvenir etc.
so the committee got to work and asked the president to arrange a letter for the dummy (to collect advertisement to print a souvenir for the fund raising) not knowing what a dummy was and not willing to show to the committee that the president of the association lacks the knowledge he asked

where are we going to keep the dummy in the music hall?