Cubs Jokes / Recent Jokes

Ryne Sandberg has expressed interest in becoming the Cubs' next manager. Because you have to start somewhere.

Three baseball fans were on their way to a game when one noticed a foot sticking out of the bushes by the side of the
road.

They stopped and discovered a nude female dead drunk.
Out of respect and propriety the Cubs fan took off his cap and placed it over her right breast.
The Red Sox fan took off his cap and placed it over her left breast. Following their lead the Yankee fan took off his cap and placed it over her crotch.

The police were called and when the officer arrived he
conducted his inspection. First he lifted up the Cubs cap
replaced it and wrote down some notes. Next he lifted the
Sox cap replaced it and wrote down some more notes.

The officer then lifted the Yankees cap replaced it then lifted it again replaced it lifted it a third time and replaced it one last time.

The Yankee fan was getting upset and finally asked What
are you a pervert or something? Why do you keep lifting and
looking more...

It was reported that at the end of the season the Chicago Cubs will be sold.

Current ownership is looking for anyone willing to piss away $5.

The Baltimore Orioles traded for Cubs prospect Felix Pie. The Orioles traded for Pie in an effort to land Prince Fielder.

Two boys are playing hockey on an inlet on a pond in suburban Chicago when one is attacker by a rabid Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy takes his stick and wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, breaking the dog's neck. A reporter who is strolling by sees the incident and rushes over to the boy. "Young White Sox Fan Saves Friend from Vicious Animal," he starts writing in his notebook."But I'm not a Sox fan," the little hero replied."Sorry, since we are in Chicago, I just assumed you were," said the reporter, and he began writing again."Cubs Fan Rescues Friends from Horrific Attack," he continued writing in his notebook."I'm not a Cubs fan either," the boy said."I assumed everyone in Chicago was either for the Cubs or the Sox. What team do you root for?" inquired the reporter. "I'm a Yankees fan," the child responded.The reporter turned the page in his notebook and wrote "Little Brat from New York more...