A cricket enthusiast died and went to hell. After a few days, the Devil came up to him and said,' What do you feel like doing today? You can have anything you like.'
'Well,' said the cricketer, I can't think of nothing better than a game of cricket. Can we do that?'
'Certainly,' said the Devil, and off they went to get changed. They arrived at a beautiful pitch, and the batsman in his new gear took up a stance. Nothing happpened.
'Come on then,' he said to the Devil,' bowl the first ball.'
'Ah, that's the Hell of it,' said the Devil.' We haven't got any balls.'
A very keen cricketer asked a divine, allegedly with good connections on high, whether there was any cricket in heaven.
The priest replied:"I cant tell you now, but if you come back on Sunday, I might have an answer. "
On sundaythe priest told the cricketer: "I've had good news and bad news. The good news is: Yes, there is cricket in heaven. And now for the bad news: You are in to bat on Friday! "
The famous cricketer was talking to a little old lady he met on the train. He told her he was a cricketer and asked if she ever watched the game of cricket.
'Cricket?' she exclaimed.
'Oh dear me no, I don't know anything about it. I bet I couldn't tell one end of an umpire from the other!'
The cricketer had been forced to go to the opera by his wife and her friends.
A team mate asked him,' What was it about?'
'I don't know,' admitted the cricketer.' I was asleep for the first two innings!'
The cricketer was visiting the psychiatrist.
Cricketer:' It's terrible. I can't score runs, I'm a terrible bowler, and I can't hold a catch. What can l do?
Doctor:' Get another job.'
Cricketer:' I can't. I'm playing for England tomorrow! '