Fourth Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Bragging golfers

    Hot 1 year ago

    Four men went to play golf.
    Three of them headed to the first tee and the fourth went into the clubhouse to take care of the bill.
    The three men started talking and bragging about their sons.

    The first man told the others, "My son is a home builder, and he is so successful he gave a friend a new home for free. Just gave it to him!"

    The second man said, "My son was a car salesman, and now he owns a multi-line dealership. He''s so successful that he gave one of his friends a new Mercedes, fully loaded."

    The third man, not wanting to be outdone, bragged, "My son is a stockbroker, and he''s doing so well that he gave his friend an entire stock and bond portfolio."

    The fourth man joined them on the tee after a few minutes of taking care of business.

    The first man mentioned, "We were just talking about our sons. How is yours doing?"

    The fourth man replied, "Well, my son more...

    Golfing Competition

    Hot 7 years ago

    A golfer is in a competitive match with a friend, who is ahead by a couple of strokes. "Boy, I'd give anything to sink this putt," the golfer mumbles to himself.
    Just then, a stranger walks up beside him and whispers, "Would you be willing to give up one fourth of your sex life?" Thinking that the man is crazy and his answer will be meaningless, the golfer also feels that maybe this is a good omen so he says, "Sure," and sinks the putt.
    Two holes later, he mumbles to himself again, "Gee, I sure would like to get an eagle on this one." The same stranger is at his side again and whispers, "Would it be worth giving up another fourth of your sex life?" Shrugging, the golfer replies, "Okay," and makes an eagle.
    On the final hole, the golfer needs another eagle to win. Without waiting for him to say anything, the stranger quickly moves to his side and says, "Would winning this match be worth giving up the rest of more...

    This is from an actual trial in the UK
    A young woman who was several months pregnant boarded a bus.
    When she noticed a young man smiling at her she began feeling humiliated on account of her condition. She changed her seat and he seemed more amused.
    She moved again and then on her fourth move he burst out laughing. She had him arrested.
    The case came before the court and the young man was asked why he acted in such a manner. His reply was:
    When the lady boarded the bus I couldn't help noticing she was pregnant. She sat under an advertisement which read "Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins", then she moved under one that read "Sloans Liniments remove swelling".
    I was even more amused when she sat under a shaving advertisement which read "William's Stick Did The Trick".
    Then I could not control myself any longer when on the fourth move she sat under an advertisement which read "Dunlop Rubber would have prevented this more...

    Tim Shandy stepped into the Warm Spoon, a popular Galway tavern.To Mike Callahan, the barkeep, Shandy said "Mike, I'll be havin'three whiskeys."Callahan set up three glasses and began to pour. "Now, Timothy, it's not the usual thing for you to ask for three whiskeys. It'scelebratin', you are."Ahh, ye know me too well, Micheal, ye do. Truth, and I'm celebratingme first blow job."Callahan smiled benevolently and set a fourth glass on the bar."Now, that's special," he said. "For an old customer like y'rself, here's a fourth on the house, so I may be sharin' your celebrationwith you."Shandy shook his head, and replied "'Tis verra kind of ye, Micheal, but I'm thinkin' if three won't get rid of the taste, four won'teither."

    Four surgeons were sitting around discussing whothey like to operate on.
    The first surgeon said, "I like operating onlibrarians. When you open them up everything is in alphabetical order".
    The second surgeon said, "I like operatingon accountants. When you open them up everything is in numerical order".
    The third surgeon said, "I like operating onelectricians. When you open them up everything is color coded.
    The fourth surgeon said, "I like operatingon lawyers".
    The other three surgeons looked at each other indisbelief. One of them asked why.
    The fourth surgeon replied, "Because theyare heartless, gutless, spineless, and their ass and head are interchangeable".

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