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    Handbags

    Hot 5 years ago

    The Englishman's, Irishman's and Scotsman's wives go shopping one day to a big department store. While they are there a fire breaks out. Everyone in the store is killed, including the three women.
    Their husbands are summoned to the local police station where a policewoman breaks the news to them: "I'm afraid sirs that we believe your wives were killed in the fire at the department store. However the fire was so intense we cannot identify the bodies. Only their handbags survived the blaze. Can you identify your wives' handbags from these three found in the store?"
    The three men all look at the handbags and each one is able to identify one of the handbags as belonging to his wife. With all handbags accounted for the policewoman leaves the men to deal with their grief in peace.
    The three men sit in silence for a while, then the Englishman opens his wife's handbag and rummages through the contents, finally pulling out a half-empty packet of cigarettes and says more...

    I had eighteen bottles of whiskey in my cellar and was told by my wife that I had a drinking problem, and to empty the contents of each and every bottle down the sink, or else. I said I would and proceeded with the unpleasant task.
    I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured the contents down the sink with the exception of one glass, which I drank.
    I then withdrew the cork from the second bottle and did likewise with it, with the exception of one glass, which I drank.
    I then withdrew the cork from the third bottle and poured the whiskey down the sink which I drank.
    I pulled the cork from the fourth bottle down the sink and poured the bottle down the glass, which I drank.
    I pulled the bottle from the cork of the next and drank one sink out of it, and threw the rest down the glass.
    I pulled the sink out of the next glass and poured the cork down the bottle. Then I corked the sink with the glass, bottled the drink and drank the pour.
    When I had more...

    I had eighteen bottles of whiskey in the cellar and my wife insisted I empty the contents of each bottle down the sink, or else...
    After careful consideration, I reluctantly agreed and finally proceeded with the unpleasant task.
    I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured the contents down the sink with the exception of one glass, which I drank.
    Then, I withdrew the cork from the second bottle and did likewise with it, with the exception of one glass, which I drank.
    I then withdrew the cork from the third bottle and poured the whiskey down the sink which I drank.
    I pulled the cork from the fourth bottle down the sink and poured the bottle down the glass, which I drank.
    I pulled the bottle from the cork of the next and drank one sink out of it, and threw the rest down the glass.
    I pulled the sink out of the next glass and poured the cork down the bottle.
    Then, I corked the sink with the glass, bottled the drink and drank the pour.
    When I had more...

    I had eighteen bottles of whiskey in the cellar and my wife insisted I empty the contents of each bottle down the sink, or else... After careful consideration, I reluctantly agreed and finally proceeded with the unpleasant task.
    I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured the contents down the sink with the exception of one glass, which I drank. Then, I withdrew the cork from the second bottle and did likewise with it, with the exception of one glass, which I drank.
    I then withdrew the cork from the third bottle and poured the whiskey down the sink which I drank. I pulled the cork from the fourth bottle down the sink and poured the bottle down the glass, which I drank. I pulled the bottle from the cork of the next and drank one sink out of it, and threw the rest down the glass.
    I pulled the sink out of the next glass and poured the cork down the bottle. Then, I corked the sink with the glass, bottled the drink and drank the pour. When I had everything emptied, I more...

    I had eighteen bottles of whiskey in the cellar and my wife insisted I empty the contents of each bottle down the sink, or else... After careful consideration, I reluctantly agreed and finally proceeded with the unpleasant task. I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured the contents down the sink with the exception of one glass, which I drank. Then, I withdrew the cork from the second bottle and did likewise with it, with the exception of one glass, which I drank. I then withdrew the cork from the third bottle and poured the whiskey down the sink which I drank. I pulled the cork from the fourth bottle down the sink and poured the bottle down the glass, which I drank. I pulled the bottle from the cork of the next and drank one sink out of it, and threw the rest down the glass. I pulled the sink out of the next glass and poured the cork down the bottle. Then, I corked the sink with the glass, bottled the drink and drank the pour. When I had everything emptied, I steadied the more...

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