Blond Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Smart Blond?

    Hot 2 years ago

    What do you call a smart blond?

    An Endangered species

    Blonde Dad

    Hot 2 years ago

    A blond guy and a brunette girl were happily married and about to have a baby. One day, the wife started having contractions, so the husband rushed her to the hospital. He held her hand as she went through a trying birth. In the end, there were two little baby boys.
    The blond guy turned to his wife and angrily said, "All right, who's the other father!?!"

    Blonde Friday

    Hot 3 years ago

    A business man got on an elevator in a building. When he entered the
    elevator, there was a blonde already inside and she greeted him by
    saying, "T-G-I-F"? (letters only).
    He smiled at her and replied,"S-H-I-T" (letters only)."
    She looked at him, puzzled, and said, "T-G-I-F" again.
    He acknowledged her remark again by answering, "S-H-I-T."
    The blond was trying to be friendly, so she smiled her biggest smile and
    said as sweetly as possibly "T-G-I-F" another time.
    The man smiled "S-H-I-T."
    The blond finally decided to explain things, and this time she said,
    "T-G-I-F, Thank Goodness It's Friday, get it?"
    The man answered, "Sorry, Honey, It's Thursday."

    Engagement

    Hot 7 years ago

    A man walks into a jewelry store on a friday with a sexy blond on tow.
    "We would like to have a look at your ring collection" the man says to the jeweler.
    The jeweler shows him a couple of rings in the R10k range....
    "No" the man replies, "i'm looking for something REALLY nice".
    The jeweler then takes him to the back, into the safe and past the security guards to the seriously expensive rings.
    The man selects the most impressive one and asks the jeweler - -How much for this one?
    R250k replies the jeweler, while watching the blond's face light up like a christmas tree.
    OK, i will take it says the man, but can i pay by cheque?
    "I am afraid we do not accept cheques" replies the jeweler.
    OK says the man- How about i write you the cheque, then you keep the ring and the cheque until the cheque clears, and only then will we pick the ring up.
    Fantastic plan, says the jeweler!!
    Then the man leaves the jewelry more...

    Blond Guy and HIs Lunch

    Hot 4 years ago

    There was a Irishman, Mexican, and a blond guy, who were construction workers and they were working on top of a building. It was lunch time and the Irsh man opens his lunch pail and he gets cabbage and beef and he says, "If I get one more beef and cabage for lunch I'm gonna jump off of this building."
    Then the Mexican opens his lunch pail and he gets a burrito, he says if I get one more burrito for lunch I'm gonna jump off this building. The blond man opens his lunch pale and gets a bologna sandwhich he siad if I get one more bologna sandwhich I'm goona jump off of this building.
    The next day the Irish man opens his lunch pail and finds cabage and beef so he jumps off the building to his death. Then the Mexican opens hid lunch pail and finds a burrito so he jumps off the building to his death. Then the blond guy opens his lunch pale and finds a bologna sandwhich, so he jumps off to his death as well.
    The next day at their funeral the Irish man's wife said, more...

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