"Elderly Lady's Three Wishes" joke

Hot 1 year ago

An elderly lady was rocking on her front porch, reflecting on her long life, when a Fairy Godmother suddenly appeared before her and offered to grant her three wishes.
"Well," said the woman, "I really would like to be rich."
*POOF* Her rocking chair turned to solid gold.
"I sure wouldn't mind being a young, beautiful princess," she said.
*POOF* She was immediately turned into a beautiful young princess with a stunning crown of jewels.
"Your third wish?" asked the Fairy Godmother, just as the old woman's cat wandered across the porch in front of them. "Ohh," the woman exclaimed, "Could you possibly turn my cat into a handsome young prince?"
*POOF* Standing before her was a young man far more handsome than anyone could ever imagine.
She stared at him in awe, totally smitten. As he moved towards her, she could feel her knees weaken. He bent down, lightly brushed his lips across her ear and whispered, "I'll bet you're sorry you had me neutured!"

Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!

A Texan walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles... The salesgirl notices him and asks him if she can help him. He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs him down the correct aisle.
A few minutes later, he deposits a huge more...

You mamma is soo fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out!

Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

all we need to do is put a flashlight to your hairline then we will get the batmat symbol

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Funny Joke? 22 vote(s). 82% are positive. 2 comment(s).