Wolf Jokes / Recent Jokes
For those of you about to become first-time fathers, you should know something that us old pros do: there are three stages of sex with your mate during pregnancy.
During the first trimester, you do it regular style. During the second trimester, you do it doggie style.
During the last trimester, you do it wolf style. "What the heck is wolf style?" you ask. That's when you sit by the hole and howl!
Did you hear the one about the Polish wolf?
He chewed off three legs and was still caught in the trap.
Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the woods on her way to visit her grandmother, when suddenly The Big Bad Wolf jumped out from behind a tree."Ah-ha....," The Big Bad Wolf said, "Now I've got you and I'm going toeat you! EAT! EAT! EAT!..."Little Red Riding Hood said angrily,"Damn it, doesn't anybody fuck anymore?"
The Wolf Man comes home one day from a long day at the office.
"How was work, dear?" his wife asks.
"Listen! I don't want to talk about work!" he shouts.
"Okay. Would you like to sit down and eat a nice home cooked meal?" she asks sweetly.
"Listen!" he shouts again. "I'm not hungry! I don't wanna eat! Alright! Is that alright with you? Can't I come home from work and just do my own thing without you forcing food down my throat? huh?"
At this moment, the wolf man started growling, and throwing things around the apartment in a mad rage.
Looking out the window, his wife sees a full moon and says to herself, "Well, I guess it's that time of the month."
Once upon a time, there were 3 little pigs. The straw pig, the stick pig, and the brick pig.
One day this nasty old wolf came up to the straw pigs house and said, "I'm gonna huff, and puff and blow your house down." And he did! So the straw pig went running over to the stick pig's house and said " Let me in, please, the wolf just blew down my house!!" So the stick pig let the straw pig in.
Then the wolf showed up and said, "I'm gonna huff and puff and blow your house down!" And he did! The straw pig and the stick pig went running over to the brick pig's house and said "Let us in! The wolf just blew down our houses down and we're scared!!!" So the brick pig let them in.
The wolf caught up with them and said "I'm gonna huff, and puff and blow your house down." While he was huffing and puffing, the straw pig and the stick pig were so scared! But the brick pig picked up the phone and called a friend.
A few minutes more...
A man walks into bar, sits on a nearby stool and ganders at a large jug of money. Upon pondering, he asks the bartender, "How much money is in there?"
The bartender, with a gentle smile replied, "26,000,000.."
The man jumped up with his eyes about ready to emerge from their sockets. He asked, "So is it for the poor? Or is it lika a charity?"
The bartender shook his head."No no no! That money is for the first person to complete three tasks."
A little curious, the man said, "Is that so? Well, I'm sure I could get them done, so what are they?"
Grinning slightly, the bartender replied, "First task: You must chug down a 5 gallon bucket of beer. Second task: You must pull a rotten tooth from a wolf with rabies. Then for your final task, you must have sex with a 100 year old grandmother located upstairs."
The man gulped a little, but replied, "Well, that still sounds like a deal!"
The man more...