Say Jokes / Recent Jokes
Q: Why is number six afraid?
A: Because seven eight nine (seven ate nine)
Q: How do you know when a motorcycle policeman is happy?
A: He has bugs on his teeth!
Q: What did zero say to eight?
A: Nice belt.
(The 8 looks like a 0 with a belt around its waist.)
Q: What did number 1 say to 7?
A: Nice hair
What did one magnet say to the other?
I find you very attractive.
What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?
Her New Jersey.
What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?
It's time to go to sweep.
Clinton's mail:
Dear Bill:
As a fellow Southern Baptist, I can sympathize with your predicament. Although when I was president I merely lusted in my heart, I have to admit that had I served another term, my lust might have broken free and moved down my body. God bless you in this time of trial.
Jimmy Carter
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Dear Bill:
OK, so I'll never be president, but at least Donna Rice was a fox!
Gary Hart
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My Dear Chap:
This is a bit of a sticky wicket, but if I were you, I should ask that charming Jay Leno fellow to see you through. Pop onto his show, admit that you made an ass of yourself and all will be forgiven.
Hugh Grant
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Bill:
They entrapped me, they framed me, they caught me in a motel with drugs and a prostitute, but I bounced back and so can you!
Mayor Marion more...
MURALI KRISHNAN writes from New Delhi: A Sardarji and a Bengali, both suffering from serious diseases, share the
same room in a hospital. They were violently ill and both could not even utter a word.
After a few days of living together, the Bengali gets really bored and wants to start off a conversation with his fellow patient.
He realizes that he has not enough energy left to say a sentence; so he just attempts to say a word.
After much effort he turns to the Sardarji, points his finger towards himself and says “Bengali”.
Sardarji doesn’t want to let the poor Bengali down who has struggled so hard to start a conversation.
Sardarji musters all his energy and says “Punjabi” gesturing the same way as Bengali did.
Bengali is happy now and wants to continue the conversation. After much more effort this time he says, again pointing his finger towards himself “Sharath Bose“
Sardarji after some effort says “Devindar more...
If you have something to say, raise your hand and place it over your mouth.
Whenever I say something you say:
ketchup and liquor
What did you have for breakfast?
ketchup and liquor
What did you have for lunch?
ketchup and liquor
What did you have for dinner?
ketchup and liquor
What do you do when you see a woman?
ketchup and liquor (catch up and lick her)
If you can't say something nice about somebody, then you've come to the right place.