Raining Jokes / Recent Jokes

Mary was having an affair during the day while her husband, Fred, was at work. One day she was in bed with her boyfriend, Ralph, and she heard her husband's car pull in the driveway. She yelled at Ralph "Hurry! Grab your clothes and jump out the window my husband is home early!"
Ralph looked out the window and said "I can't jump out the window! It's raining like hell out there!"
Mary cried "If my husband catches us in here, he will kill both of us!"
So the boyfriend grabbed his clothes and jumped out the window! When he landed outside he found himself in the middle of a marathon race... so he started running along side the others - only he was still in the nude, carrying his clothes on his arm. One of the runners asked him, "Do you always run in the nude?"
Ralph answered, while gasping for air "Oh yes, It feels so free having the air blow over your skin while you are running."
The other runner then asked the nude more...

What is worse than raining cats and dogs? Raining elephants!

How do you hire an elephant? Stand it on four bricks! What is the easy way to get a wild elephant? Get a tame one and annoy it! What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming? Here come the elephants! Why is an elephant braver than a hen? Because the elephant isn't chicken! What is worse than raining cats and dogs? Raining elephants! How are elephants and hippopotanuses alike? Neither can play basketball! How do you stop an angry elephant from charging? Take away it's credit cards! What did the baby elephant get when the daddy elephant sneezed? Out of the way! How do you raise a baby elephant? With a fork lift truck! What's the best way to see a charging herd of elephants? On television!

There Is an old lady who lives in a 14 story hotel. She lives on the 14th floor. Every morning, she goes down into the lobby, gets cereal and goes on a walk. On mornings when it is raining, she uses the elevator all of the way up to get to her room after she goes on her walk. On mornings when it is not raining after she's eaten, she only goes to floor 7 and then uses the stairs to walk the rest of the way up.
Why?

Hey! Benny did you know it was raining so hard yesterday I stepped in a puddle!!!

Why did a Sardarji make a hole in his umbrella?
Ans:- TO SEE WHETHER IT IS RAINING OR NOT.

One day while sleeping with his neighbor's wife, Ralph heard his neighbor's car pull in the driveway.
"Hurry! Grab your clothes and jump out the window, Ted's home early," she yelled. Ralph looked out the window and said, "I can't jump out the window! It's raining like hell out there."
She cried, "If Ted catches us in here, he will kill both of us!"
So, Ralph grabbed his clothes and jumped out the window. When he landed outside he found himself in the middle of a marathon race, so he started running along side the others, only he was still in the nude, carrying his clothes on his arm. One of the runners asked him, "Do you always run in the nude?"
Ralph answered, while gasping for air, "Oh yes, it feels so free having the air blow over your skin while you are running."
Then another runner asked, "Do you always run carrying your clothes on your arm?"
Ralph answered breathlessly, "Oh yes, that way I more...