Officially Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Resignation As An Adult

    Hot 3 years ago

    I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult. I have decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of an 8 year-old again.
    I want to go to McDonald's and think that it's a four star restaurant.
    I want to think M&Ms are better than money because you can eat them.
    I want to lie under a big oak tree and run a lemonade stand with my friends on a hot summer's day.
    I want to return to a time when life was simple; when all you knew were colors, multiplication tables, and nursery rhymes, but that didn't bother you, because you didn't know what you didn't know and you didn't care.
    I want to believe that anything is possible. I want to live simple again. I don't want my day to consist of computer crashes, mountains of paperwork, depressing news, how to survive more days in the month than there is money in the bank, doctor bills, gossip, illness, and loss of loved ones.
    I want to believe in the power of smiles, hugs, a kind word, truth, justice, more...

    Adult Resignation

    Hot 2 years ago

    I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult.
    I have decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of an 8 year old again.
    I want to go to McDonald's and think that it's a four star restaurant.
    I want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle and make ripples with rocks.
    I want to think M&Ms are better than money because you can eat them.
    I want to lie under a big oak tree and run a lemonade stand with my friends on a hot summer's day.
    I want to return to a time when life was simple. When all you knew were colors, multiplication tables, and nursery rhymes, but that didn't bother you, because you didn't know what you didn't know and you didn't care. All you knew was to be happy because you were blissfully unaware of all the things that should make you worried or upset.
    I want to think the world is fair. That everyone is honest and good.
    I want to believe that anything is possible.
    I want to be oblivious to the more...

    A Russian couple was walking down the street in St. Petersburg the other night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose. "I think it's raining," he said to his wife."No, that felt more like snow to me," she replied. "No, I'm sure it was just rain, he said." Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing. Just then they saw a minor communist party official walking toward them. "Let's not fight about it," the man said, "let's ask Comrade Rudolph whether it's officially raining or snowing."As the official approached, the man said, "Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?" "It's raining, of course," he answered and walked on. But the woman insisted: "I know that felt like snow!" To which the man quietly replied: "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!"

    A Russian couple were walking down the street in Moscow one night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose. "I think it's raining," he said to his wife.
    "No, that felt more like snow to me," she replied.
    "No, I'm sure it was just rain," he said.
    Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing. Just then they saw a Communist Party official walking toward them.
    "Let's not fight about it," the man said, "Let's ask Comrade Rudolph whether it's officially raining or snowing."
    As the official approached, the man said, "Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?"
    "It's raining, of course," he replied, and walked on.
    But the woman insisted: "I know that felt like snow!" to which the man quietly replied: "Rudolph the Red, knows rain, dear."

    Back in the old days of the Soviet Union, a Russian couple were walking down the street in Moscow one night when the man felt a drop hit his nose.
    'I think it's raining,' he said to his wife.
    'No, that felt more like snow to me,' she replied.
    'No, I'm sure it was just rain,' he said.
    Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing.
    Just then they saw a minor Communist Party official walking towards them.
    'Let's not fight about it,' the man said. 'Let's ask Comrade Rudolph whether it's officially raining or snowing.'
    As the official approached, the man said, 'Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?'
    'It's raining, of course,' he replied, and walked on.
    But the woman insisted, ‘I know that felt like snow.'
    The man quietly replied, 'Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!'

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