Olympic Jokes / Recent Jokes
Q. What is the difference between Olympic swimmers and Olympic divers?
A. Mark Spitz and Greg Swallows.
The Top 9 Signs Your City Used Bribes to Become an Olympic Site
9. IOC members seem unconcerned over scheduling conflicts due to the yachting, diving and swimming events all being held in the 34th Street YMCA pool.
8. All 75 of the new hires in the mayor's office are named either Ingrid or Sven.
7. After Philadelphia lands the Summer Games, Juan Antonio Samaranch sports a hood ornament that looks strangely like the Liberty Bell.
6. Only someone bribed with hookers and college tuition wouldn't think the term "New York City Hospitality Committee" is an oxymoron.
5. Karl Malone is now playing forward for the Utah Samaranches.
4. T-shirt for sale in the hotel lobby: "My dad went to Salt Lake City, and all I got was this T-shirt and college tuition."
3. "Miss Salt Lake" for 1999 requires a translator to deliver her coronation speech.
2. New Olympic mascots: Vinny and Knuckles.
and the Number 1 Sign Your City Used Bribes to more...
The Top 9 Signs Your City Used Bribes to Become an Olympic Site9. IOC members seem unconcerned over scheduling conflicts due to the yachting, diving and swimming events all being held in the 34th Street YMCA pool. 8. All 75 of the new hires in the mayor's office are named either Ingrid or Sven. 7. After Philadelphia lands the Summer Games, Juan Antonio Samaranch sports a hood ornament that looks strangely like the Liberty Bell. 6. Only someone bribed with hookers and college tuition wouldn't think the term "New York City Hospitality Committee" is an oxymoron. 5. Karl Malone is now playing forward for the Utah Samaranches. 4. T-shirt for sale in the hotel lobby: "My dad went to Salt Lake City, and all I got was this T-shirt and college tuition." 3. "Miss Salt Lake" for 1999 requires a translator to deliver her coronation speech. 2. New Olympic mascots: Vinny and Knuckles.and the Number 1 Sign Your City Used Bribes to Become an Olympic Site...1. The IOC more...
A man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic
condoms. Clearly impressed, he buys a pack. Upon getting home he
announces to his wife the purchase he just made.
"Olympic condoms?", she asks. "What makes them so special?"
"There are three colors", he replies, "Gold, Silver and Bronze."
"What color are you going to wear tonight?", she asks cheekily.
"Gold of course", says the man proudly.
The wife responds, "Really, why don't you wear Silver, it would
be nice if you came second for a change!."
John came home from work one afternoon, and being horny as hell took his
beautiful girlfriend, Suzy, upstairs to the bedroom. He proceeded to
undress her, but before he took his pants off, he removed a packet of
condoms from his pocket. "What are those?" Suzy asked."Olympic condoms" replied John."What makes them Olympic?"Suzy asked. "There are three colors, gold, silver and bronze," said John."Which color are you planning to wear tonight?" asked Suzy."Gold of course!" replied John."Well" said Suzy "Why don't you wear silver and come second for a change!"
Why doesn`t Mexico have an Olympic team? Any Mexican that can run jump or swim is in the US!
Why doesn't Mexico have an Olympic team?
Because everybody who can run, jump, and swim is already in the U.S.