Silver Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by an enemy Indian War Party.

    The Indian Chief proclaims,

    "So, YOU are the great Lone Ranger... In honor of the Harvest Festival, YOU will be executed in three days."

    "Before I kill you, I grant you three requests. What is your FIRST request???"

    The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse."

    The Chief nods and Silver is brought before the Lone Ranger who whispers in Silver's ear, and the horse gallops away. Later that evening, Silver returns with a beautiful blonde woman on his back. As the Indian Chief watches, the blonde enters the Lone Ranger's tent and spends the night.

    The next morning the Indian Chief admits he's impressed. "You have a very fine and loyal horse, but I will still kill you in two days. What is your SECOND request???"

    The Lone Ranger again asks to speak to his horse.

    Silver is brought more...

    Silver is better.

    Hot 1 year ago

    A man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms. Clearly impressed, he buys a pack.

    Upon getting home he announces to his wife the purchase he just made.

    "Olympic condoms?", she blurts, "What makes them so special?"

    "There are three colors", he replies, "Gold, Silver and Bronze."

    "What color are you going to wear tonight?", she asks cheekily.

    "Gold of course", says the man proudly.

    The wife responds wryly, "Why don't you wear Silver? It would be nice if you came second for a change."

    The Acid Test

    Hot 2 years ago

    During class, the chemistry professor was demonstrating the properties of various acids. "Now I'm dropping this silver coin into this glass of acid. Will it dissolve?"
    "No, sir," a student called out.
    "No?" queried the professor. "Perhaps you can explain why the silver coin won't dissolve."
    "Because if it would, you wouldn't have dropped it in!"

    Bad Conductor

    Hot 3 months ago

    The world's best and most famous conductor makes a small mistake while conducting the New York Symphony Orchestra. The audience didn't notice, the orchestra didn't notice either, but he knew he'd made the mistake and decided that he should retire. Once the performance had finished, he turned and faced the audience and said "Ladies and Gentleman, this is my last performance as a world class conductor. I'm now announcing my retirement."
    After a few minutes silence from the shocked audience, and orchestra too, he was greeted with boos and hisses. He walked from the stage, only to be met by his manager, standing in between two gorilla-sized bodyguards. "Oh no you don't", his manager said, "you're not retiring."
    Forced backed to work by his manager, he endured week after week of conducting he no longer wanted to do. While lying in bed one night with his wife of many years, he turned to her and said "Dear, would you be able to get me a small more...

    She is angry at you

    Hot 1 year ago

    Worried because they hadn't heard anything for days from the widow in the neighboring apartment, Mrs. Silver said to her son, "Timmy, would you go next door and see how old Mrs. Kirkland is?"A few minutes later, Timmy returned."Well," asked Mrs. Silver, "is she all right?""She's fine, except that she's angry at you.""At me?" the woman exclaimed. "Whatever for?""She said 'It's none of your business how old she is,'" snickered Timmy.

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