Lusted Jokes

Three ministers and their wives discovered that their vacations were all at the same time, so to save money, they decided to rent an RV and travel together. But on the second day out, they were in a terrible accident, and all six were killed. They came to the Pearly Gates of Heaven and were greeted by St. Peter. "I know you are all men of the cloth," said St. Peter, "but as a matter of protocol I need to look up your records." He punched a few keys on his computer and studied the screen. He looked at the first minister's record, and grimly shook his head. "I'm sorry. Our files say you lusted after alcohol, and though you never drank any, lust is just as bad as the deed itself. It says here your lust was so strong that you wouldn't get married until you met a woman named Sherry." Poof, the minister and his wife were banished to Hell. He checked the next minister's record. Again he shook his head and said, "I'm sorry. Our files say you lusted after more...

This fellow comes to confession. "Father, he said, forgive mefor I have sinned."The priest asked, "What did you do, my son?""I lusted," the fellow replied."Tell me about it," the priest said.The fellow then related his story. "Father, I am a deliverymanfor UPS. Yesterday I was making a delivery in the affluentsection of the city. When I rang the bell, the door opened andthere stood the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Shehad long blonde hair and eyes like emeralds. She was dressedin a sheer dressing gown that showed her perfect figure. And, she asked if I would like to come in.""And, what did you do, my son?" asked the priest."Father, I did not go in the house but I lusted. Oh, how Ilusted," replied the man."Your sin has been forgiven," replied the priest. "You will getyour reward in heaven, my son.""A reward, father? What do you think my reward might be?"the fellow asked.The more...

This fellow comes to confession. "Father, he said, forgive mefor I have sinned."The priest asked, "What did you do, my son?""I lusted," the fellow replied."Tell me about it," the priest said. The fellow then related his story. "Father, I am a deliverymanfor UPS. Yesterday I was making a delivery in the affluentsection of the city. When I rang the bell, the door opened andthere stood the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Shehad long blonde hair and eyes like emeralds. She was dressedin a sheer dressing gown that showed her perfect figure. And, she asked if I would like to come in.""And, what did you do, my son?" asked the priest."Father, I did not go in the house but I lusted. Oh, how Ilusted," replied the man."Your sin has been forgiven," replied the priest. "You will getyour reward in heaven, my son.""A reward, father? What do you think my reward might be?"the fellow asked. The more...

This fellow comes to confession. "Father, he said, forgive mefor I have sinned." The priest asked, "What did you do, my son?" "I lusted," the fellow replied." Tell me about it," the priest said. The fellow then related his story. "Father, I am a deliverymanfor UPS. Yesterday I was making a delivery in the affluentsection of the city. When I rang the bell, the door opened andthere stood the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Shehad long blonde hair and eyes like emeralds. She was dressedin a sheer dressing gown that showed her perfect figure. And, she asked if I would like to come in." "And, what did you do, my son?" asked the priest." Father, I did not go in the house but I lusted. Oh, how Ilusted," replied the man." Your sin has been forgiven," replied the priest. "You will getyour reward in heaven, my son." "A reward, father? What do you think my reward might be?" the fellow more...