Edition Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Brooklyn version of
    Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside New York. If you
    have one of the Brooklyn editions you may need some help understanding
    the commands.

    - The Brooklyn edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen.
    - It reads WINDAS 98 with a background picture of the East River with a
    floating body. It is shipped with a' NYPD BLUE' screensaver.
    - Also note the Recycle Bin is labeled' Garbitch'
    - My Computer is called' My Freakin Computer,'
    - Dialup Networking is called' Good Fellas',
    - Control Panel is known as the' da Tote Board,'
    - Hard Drive is referred to as' da trunk', and....
    - Floppies are them' little Freakin plastic disc tings'.

    OTHER FEATURES:

    * Instead of an error message you get a winda covered with steel bars and Grafitti.
    * OK= do it I tell ya
    * Cancel = hell no
    * Reset = dis is more...

    A special Arkansas edition of Windows XP has been developed.
    It is distinguished by the unique opening screen. It reads: WINDERS XP, and has a a Dukes of Hazzard screen saver.
    Other differentiating features:
    The Recycle Bin is labeled "Outhouse"
    My Computer is called "This Dern Contraption"
    Dial up Networking is called "Good Ol' Boys"
    Control Panel is known as the "The Dashboard"
    Hard Drive is referred to as "4- Wheel Drive"
    Floppies are "them little ol plastic disc thangs"
    Instead of an error message a "garbage bag and roll of duct tape" pops up
    CHANGES IN TERMINOLOGY IN ARKANSAS EDITION:
    OK... ats aw-right
    Cancel... stopdat
    Reset... try er agin
    Yes... yep
    No... noop
    Find... hunt fer it
    Go to... over yonder
    Back... back yonder
    Help... hep me out here
    Stop... kwitit
    Start... crank er up
    Settings... settins
    Programs... stuff more...

    (Forwarded by an American friend of Italian descent).
    It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Brooklyn version of Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside New York. If you have one of the Brooklyn editions you may need some help understanding the commands.
    The Brooklyn edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen.
    It reads WINDAS 98 with a background picture of the East River with a floating body. It is shipped with a 'NYPD BLUE' screensaver.
    Also note the Recycle Bin is labeled 'Garbitch'
    My Computer is called 'My Freakin Computer,'
    Dialup Networking is called 'Good Fellas',
    Control Panel is known as the 'da Tote Board,'
    Hard Drive is referred to as 'da trunk', and...
    Floppies are them 'little Freakin plastic disc tings'.
    Instead of an error message you get a winda covered with steel bars and Grafitti.
    OTHER FEATURES:
    WINDOWS 98WINDAS 98
    OKdo it I tell ya
    Cancelhell more...

    New Office Lingo

    Hot 5 years ago

    Blame storming - sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.
    Beepilepsy - The brief seizure people sometimes suffer when their beepers go off, especially in vibrator mode. Characterized by physical spasms, goofy facial expressions, and stopping speech in mid sentence.
    Cube farm - an office filled with cubicles.
    Ego surfing - scanning the Net, databases, print media etc. looking for references to one's own name.
    Prairie dogging - something loud happens in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
    Idea hamsters - people who always seem to have their idea generators running.
    Mouse potato - the on-line generation's answer to the couch potato.
    Ohnosecond - that minuscule fraction of time in which you realize you've just made a big mistake.
    SITCOM - stands for Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage.
    Stress puppy - a person who thrives on being more...

    Did you hear about the new Catholic edition of Playboy?
    It's got the same centerfold as the regular edition, but you have to pull it out at just the right moment.

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