Delicious Jokes / Recent Jokes

Three sons left home, went out on their own and prospered. Getting back together, they discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly Mother.
The first said, "I built a big house for our Mother."
The second said, "I sent her a Mercedes with a driver."
The third smiled and said, "I've got you both beat. You remember how Mom enjoyed reading the Bible? And you know she can't see very well any more. I sent her a remarkable parrot that recites the entire Bible. It took Elders in the church 12 years to teach him. He's one of a kind. Mama just has to name the chapter and verse, and the parrot recites it."
Soon thereafter, Mom sent out her letters of thanks: "Milton," she wrote one son, "the house you built is so huge. I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house."
"Gerald," she wrote to another, "I am too old to travel any more. I stay most of the time at home, so I rarely use the more...

One day a mom who had three sons had a birthday. Each son wanted to get her the best gift ever, so they all went shopping.

Her first son buys her a really fancy car. The second son buys her a really huge house. The third son went to talk to the priest. He talked with them for a while about a parrot that was trained to say the whole Bible.

The priests said that it would cost a ton of money, but the son agreed that it was worth it to pay one million dollars every year for his mom to own the parrot.

Later the mom was writing thank you cards. To her first son she wrote, "Thank you so much for the great car, but I'm too old to drive."

To her second she wrote, "Thank you for the great house, but it would take a century to clean and I don't need that much space."
To her third son she wrote, "O... my dear... dear son, that was delicious chicken."

An old man is lying on his deathbed with all his children, grandchildren and his older great-grandchildren all around, teary-eyed at the approaching finale of a very long and productive life. The old man in is a terminal coma, and the doctors have confirmed that the waiting will be over within the next twenty-four hours. Suddenly, the old man opens his eyes and croaks: "I must be dreaming of heaven. I smell your grandmother's strudel." "No, grandfather, you are not dreaming. Grandmother is baking strudel now." "I know I will never have another taste of her delicious strudel after this one. Could you please go down and get me a sliver?" the old man begs with what is left of his final breath. One of the grandchildren is immediately dispatched to honor the old man's last request. After a long time, he returns empty-handed. "Did you bring me one last piece of your grandmother's delicious strudel?" the old man plaintively queries? "I'm very more...

A couple go to Mexico City for vacation and go to a famous local restaurant. They ask the waiter's opinion about what to order, and he tells them they have a special each Sunday that's wonderful, so the couple orders that. With great fanfare, the waiter brings out a large silver serving platter with two huge steaming rounds of meat, juices dripping; it smells delicious and tastes even better. The couple are delighted with their meal and ask the waiter just what the fabulous meat dish was. "Senor," he explains, "each Saturday night, we have the bullfights, and that was the bull's balls you ate. The couple are a bit taken aback by what they had just eaten, but it was delicious, so they get over it. Six months later, the couple returns back in Mexico City and decide to go to the same same restaurant. Feeling adventuresome, they order the same dish. Once again, with great fanfare, the waiter brings out the huge silver serving dish and places it on the table. But this time more...

Rosie O' Donnell is calling her relationship with new girlfriend Tracy Kachtick-Anders "delicious". Have you seen Rosie O' Donnell lately? What hasn't she called delicious?

A young man was visiting his brother and sister-in-law and was surprised to find his young nephew, Timmy, helping them bake the cupcakes. After they were done, his sister-in-law allowed Timmy to put the icing on. When he had finished, he brought them to the table.

"The cupcakes look delicious, Tim." his uncle said. And he took a bite while looking at the other cupcakes. "Timmy these are so good."

As he finished one and took another he again complimented his little nephew. "The cupcakes look beautiful, Tim," his uncle said. "How did you get them iced so evenly?" And he took a large bite while waiting for the answer.

His nephew replied, "I licked them."

Three mustaches walk into a bar.

The first mustache says, “I’m lonely, could I have a drink made of something other than mustache?” The bartender gives him a drink made entirely of the hair from a sideburn. The first mustache says, “Wow, that’s delicious.”

The second mustache says, “I’m tired, can I have a drink made of something other than face-hair?” The bartender gives him a drink made entirely of the hair off the top of his head. The second mustache says, “Thanks, this is terrific head hair.”

The third mustache says to the bartender, “I’m bored, can I have a drink made of something other than boredom?” The bartender gives him a drink made of mustache. The third mustache says, “What’s this? I’m not a cannibal!” And the bartender says, “Well you look like a mustache to me.”