Cursor Jokes

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    Tech Support (Classic)

    Hot 6 years ago

    "Hello. Tech Support; may I help you?"
    "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
    "What sort of trouble?"
    "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
    "Went away?"
    "They disappeared."
    "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
    "Nothing."
    "Nothing?"
    "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
    "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
    "How do I tell?"
    [Uh-oh. Well, let's give it a try anyway.]
    "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
    "What's a sea-prompt?"
    [Uh-huh, thought so. Let's try a different tack.]
    "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
    "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
    [Ah-at least s/he knows what a cursor is. Sounds like a hardware more...

    "Good Afternnoon, Ridge Hall, computer assistant; may I help you?"
    "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
    "What sort of trouble?"
    "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went
    away."
    "Went away?"
    "They disappeared."
    "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
    "Nothing."
    "Nothing?"
    "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
    "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
    "How do I tell?"
    "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
    "What's a sea-prompt?"
    "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
    "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
    "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
    "What's a monitor?"
    "It's the thing with the screen on it more...

    "Hello. Tech Support; may I help you?"
    "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
    "What sort of trouble?"
    "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
    "Went away?"
    "They disappeared."
    "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
    "Nothing."
    "Nothing?"
    "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
    "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"
    "How do I tell?"
    [Uh-oh. Well, let's give it a try anyway.] "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
    "What's a sea-prompt?"
    [Uh-huh, thought so. Let's try a different tack.] "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"
    "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
    [Ah-at least s/he knows what a cursor is. Sounds like a hardware problem. I more...

    "Hello. Tech Support; may I help you?" "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
    "What sort of trouble?" "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
    "Went away?" "They disappeared."
    "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?" "Nothing."
    "Nothing?" "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
    "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?" "How do I tell?"
    [Uh-oh. Well, let's give it a try anyway.] "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?" "What's a sea-prompt?"
    [Uh-huh, thought so. Let's try a different tack.] "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?" "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
    [Ah-at least s/he knows what a cursor is. Sounds like a hardware problem. I wonder if s/he's kicked out more...

    The group shared their favorites. Windows that crack or melt into a
    slag heap. The MacIntosh IBM DOS emulator that, when fired up,
    begins to put up a zippy MacIntosh screen, stops halfway down the
    screen to declare, "Oops? Sorry. You wanted 1950s technology." It
    then goes into command line mode. The supposed unused ROM hook in
    the Mac that would have caused a monkey to dance across the screen
    ONCE upon the 7698th (or whatever) boot of the machine. Insects
    crawling around the screen.
    As you read this, project programmers in ski-masks are already coding
    up:
    ELUSIVE MENU: When the mouse cursor enters such menus, the menus
    dodge away while insulting the user with appropriate language and
    gestures. Somebody informed us this is just like the Mac Bomb
    program.
    CRASHING WINDOWS: You begin to move a window. Suddenly it
    accelerates out of your control up toward the corner of the screen.
    When it reaches the corner, it more...

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