A cavalry batallion has just been assigned a new Sargeant. The guy is a mean s.o.b. who wants to whip the troops into shape. He commands that they clean up the base.
Right before he leaves, the sargeant sees this ratty old nasty horse and says, "And for God's sakes... get rid of this old horse".
Later that night a private comes to the sargeant and pleads his case. "Sarge, I know that old horse is nasty but there's no women around and the old horse is the only thing we got."
The sargeant sympathizes and allows them to keep the horse. A few weeks later the sarge is gettin' the old itch, so he decides he's gonna' give it a shot. He says, "Private... prepare the horse".
He gets up on a stool and really has his way with this horse. When he finishes he says, "So private, is that the way the men do it?"
The private responds, "Well Sir... we usually ride it into town to the whorehouse but I guess that could work too..."
Infantry: A good rifle
Cavalry: A big tank
Artillery: A loud boom
UPON HEARING FIREWORKS
Infantry: Cool, just like a live fire exercise
Cavalry: Not loud enough
Artillery: Fireworks? What fireworks?
Infantry: Waste of rations
Cavalry: Waste of rations
Artillery: Waste of rations
IDEA OF FUN
Infantry: Not having to "pepper-pot" an entire grid square before the objective
Cavalry: Racing across a grid square on "full stab"
Artillery: Leveling a grid square
Infantry: "Ballad of the Green Beret"
Cavalry: "Purple Haze"
Artillery: Anything, just play it LOUD!
BIGGEST LUXURY IN THE FIELD
Infantry: Engineers blowing trenches for them with C4
Cavalry: Grunts to dig their trenches for them
A LONG ROUTE MARCH WITH FULL KIT
Infantry: 20 clicks
Cavalry: From the hangars to the tank