Arguing Jokes / Recent Jokes
There were these two professors arguing over which one had the dumber child. Each professor thought his was the bigger idiot. The first professor yells "There is no way that your son is dumber. My son has to be THE stupidest kid on Earth."
The second professor says "No way, Jose. My son is the bigger idiot."
The first professor says "Let me prove it to you. Hey Jake! (Jake runs to his father) I don't know if I left myself at the office or not. Would you run there and find out. If I'm there then tell me to come home and eat dinner."
The son says, gleefully, "Sure dad" and runs off.
The second professor not to be outdone says "Oh Yea! Watch this! Hey Sam! Come here! (Sam runs to his father) Here are two pennies. With one penny buy a car and the other buy a microwave."
Sam says "OK." and leaves. The professors keep arguing.
Jake and Sam meet in the street. And they start arguing which one has the dumber more...
Three freshman engineering students were sitting around one day arguing about who might've designed the human body.
The first one said, "It must've been a mechanical engineer. The human body has all those levers and pivots and stuff - a mechanical engineer must have designed all that."
The second one said, "No, it had to have been an electrical engineer. The complex way the nerves are wired up to the brain must have been designed by an electrical engineer."
Then the third one said, "No, it was a civil engineer. Who else would have run a waste water line through a recreational area?"
Two blondes were walking through the woods when one looked down and said "Oh, look at the deer tracks."
The other blonde looks and says "Those aren't deer tracks, those are wolf tracks."
"No. Those are deer tracks."
They keep arguing, and arguing, and one half hour later they were both killed by a train.
Two blondes were walking through the woods when one looked down and said "Oh, look at the deer tracks."The other blonde looks and says "Those aren't deer tracks, those are wolf tracks.""No. Those are deer tracks."They keep arguing, and arguing, and one half hour later they were both killed by a train.
Two women, who are dog owners, are arguing which dog is smarter.
First woman: My dog is so smart. Every morning he waits for the paperboy to come around and then he takes a newspaper and brings it to me.
Second woman: I know.
First one: How?
Second one: My dog told me.
Two guys were riding in a car, arguing about how to say the name of the city that they were in. One said "Louieville" and the other "Louiseville."
They went on arguing and arguing, until they came upon a fast-food restaurant.
The one guy goes inside and says to the waitress, "Tell me the name of the place where I am right now really, really, really slowly."
The waitress goes, "Bur-ger-King."
So Bill Gates and the chairman of GM are arguing over which company is better. Bill Gates boast, " If cars grew in technology as fast as computers did, we would be driving v-32 instead of v-8, our cars would get 5000 miles to the gallon, the top speed would be mach seven. Anyway the sticker price for a car would be 50 dollars."
And which the GM replies, " Sure, but would you really want a car that crashes 4 times a day!"