Alternatives Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    If God was process oriented, the Book of Genesis might read something like this:
    In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was without form and void, so God created a small committee. He carefully balanced the committee vis-a-vis race, gender, ethnic origin, and economic status in order to interface pluralism with the holistic concept of self-determination according to adjudicatory guidelines.
    Even God was impressed, and so ended the first day.
    And God said, "Let the committee draw up a mission statement." And behold, the committee decided to prioritize and strategize and God called that process empowerment. And God thought it sounded pretty good.
    And evening and morning were the second day.
    And God said, "Let the committee determine goals and objectives and engage in long-term planning." Unfortunately, a debate about the semantic differences between goals and objectives pre-empted almost all of the third day. Although more...

    Microsoft's ad slogan for Windows 95 was "Where do you want to go today?"
    Now that Windows 98 is out, Microsoft have disclosed the alternatives that were considered when Windows 95 was released:
    1. Windows: The colorful clown suit for DOS.
    2. Double your drive space: Delete Windows!
    3. Windows and DOS: A turtle and its shell.
    4. Microsoft gives you Windows - OS/2 gives you the whole house.
    5. A computer without Windows is like a fish without a bicycle.
    6. Bang on the left side of your computer to restart Windows.
    7. Error #152 - Windows not found: (C)heer (P)arty (D)ance.
    8. I still miss Windows, but my aim is getting better.
    9. I'll never forget the first time I ran Windows, but I'm trying.
    10. My lastest screen-saver: Curtains for Windows.
    11. OS/2... Opens up Windows, shuts up Gates.
    12. Out of disk space. Delete Windows? [Y]es [H]ell Yes!
    13. Windows 3.1: The best $89 solitaire game you can buy.
    14. Windows NT: more...

    Microsoft's ad slogan for Windows 95 was "Where do you want to go today?"
    Now that Windows 98 is out, Microsoft have disclosed the alternatives that were considered when Windows 95 was released:
    1. Windows: The colorful clown suit for DOS.
    2. Double your drive space: Delete Windows!
    3. Windows and DOS: A turtle and its shell.
    4. Microsoft gives you Windows - OS/2 gives you the whole house.
    5. A computer without Windows is like a fish without a bicycle.
    6. Bang on the left side of your computer to restart Windows.
    7. Error #152 - Windows not found: (C)heer (P)arty (D)ance.
    8. I still miss Windows, but my aim is getting better.
    9. I'll never forget the first time I ran Windows, but I'm trying.
    10. My lastest screen-saver: Curtains for Windows.
    11. OS/2... Opens up Windows, shuts up Gates.
    12. Out of disk space. Delete Windows? [Y]es [H]ell Yes!
    13. Windows
    3.1: The best $89 solitaire game you can buy.
    14. Windows more...

    Microsoft's ad slogan for Windows 95 was "Where do you want to go today?"Now that Windows 98 is out, Microsoft have disclosed the alternatives that were considered when Windows 95 was released :1. Windows: The colorful clown suit for DOS.2. Double your drive space: Delete Windows! 3. Windows and DOS: A turtle and its shell.4. Microsoft gives you Windows - OS/2 gives you the whole house.5. A computer without Windows is like a fish without a bicycle.6. Bang on the left side of your computer to restart Windows.7. Error #152 - Windows not found: (C)heer (P)arty (D)ance.8. I still miss Windows, but my aim is getting better.9. I'll never forget the first time I ran Windows, but I'm trying.10. My lastest screen-saver: Curtains for Windows.11. OS/2... Opens up Windows, shuts up Gates.12. Out of disk space. Delete Windows? [Y]es [H]ell Yes! 13. Windows3.1: The best $89 solitaire game you can buy.14. Windows NT: Insert wallet into Drive A: and press any key to empty.15. How do you more...

    Microsoft's ad slogan for Windows 95 was "Where do you want to go today?"

    Now that Windows 98 is out, Microsoft have disclosed the alternatives that were considered when Windows 95 was released:


    1. Windows: The colorful clown suit for DOS.
    2. Double your drive space: Delete Windows!
    3. Windows and DOS: A turtle and its shell.
    4. Microsoft gives you Windows - OS/2 gives you the whole house.
    5. A computer without Windows is like a fish without a bicycle.
    6. Bang on the left side of your computer to restart Windows.
    7. Error #152 - Windows not found: (C)heer (P)arty (D)ance.
    8. I still miss Windows, but my aim is getting better.
    9. I'll never forget the first time I ran Windows, but I'm trying.
    10. My lastest screen-saver: Curtains for Windows.
    11. OS/2. .. Opens up Windows, shuts up Gates.
    12. Out of disk space. Delete Windows? [Y]es [H]ell Yes!
    13. Windows
    3. 1: The best $89 solitaire more...

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