Ahmed Jokes / Recent Jokes

Ahmed was in the hospital, near death, so the family sent for his friend Tauseef Khan. As Tauseef stood beside the bed, Ahmed's frail condition grew worse, and he motioned frantically for something to write on. Tauseef lovingly handed him a pen and piece of paper, and Ahmed used his last ounce of strength to scribble a note, then died.
Tauseef thought it best not to look at the note just then, so he slipped it into his jacket pocket. Several days later, at the funeral, Tauseef was visting Ahmed's family. He realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he'd worn the day Ahmed died.
"You know," he said, "Ahmed handed me a note just before he died. I haven't read it, but knowing him, I'm sure there's a word of inspiration there for us all." He unfolded the note and read aloud, "You're - standing - on - my - oxygen - tube!"

Knock Knock Who's there? Abbott! Abbott who? Abbott time you answered the door! Knock Knock Who's there? Ahmed! Ahmed who? Ahmedeus Motzart! Knock Knock Who's there? Alaska! Alaska who? Alaska my friend the question then! Knock Knock Who's there? Alfred! Alfred who! Alfred of the dark! Knock Knock Who's there? Alma! Alma who? Alma not going to tell you!

Knock KnockWhos there! Ahmed! Ahmed who? Ahmed a big mistake coming here!

A mother enters her daughter's bedroom and sees a letter over the bed.With the worst premonition, she reads it, with trembling hands:
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm telling you that I eloped with my new boyfriend. I found real passion and he is so nice, with all his piercing and tattoos and his big motorcycle. But it is not only that mom, I'm pregnant and Ahmed said that we will be very happy in his trailer in the woods. He wants to have many more children with me and that's one of my dreams. I've learned that marijuana doesn't hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and his friends, who are providing us with all the cocaine and ecstasies we may want. In the meantime, we'll pray for the science to find the AIDS cure, for Ahmed to get better, he deserves it. Don't worry Mom, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Some day I'll visit for you to know your grandchildren.
Love
Your daughter, Judith
PS: Mom, it's not true. I'm at the more...

Knock Knock Who's there! Ahmed! Ahmed who? Ahmed a big mistake coming here!