"Christmas Present" joke
It was the day after Christmas at a church in San Francisco. Pastor Mike was looking at the nativity scene outside when he noticed the baby Jesus was missing from the figures.
Immediately, Pastor Mike turned towards the church to call the police. But as he was about to do so, he saw little Jimmy with a red wagon, and in the wagon was the figure of the little infant, Jesus.
Pastor Mike walked up to Jimmy and said, "Well, Jimmy, where did you get the little infant?"
Jimmy replied, "I got him from the church."
"And why did you take him?"
With a sheepish smile, Jimmy said, "Well, about a week before Christmas I prayed to little Lord Jesus. I told him if he would bring me a red wagon for Christmas, I would give him a ride around the block in it."
Q: What's the worst trick you can do to your blind brother?
A: Leave the plunger in the toilet
Knock Knock Whos there? Luke Luke who? Look through the keyhole and you will find out!
Your momma is so fat when she fell in the grand canyon she got stuck half way down.
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer
You mamma is soo fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out!