Terrific Jokes

If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?

If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

Sir is comfortably seated in an armchair in the library, reading a newspaper. John has just brought in coffee, when a loud screech echoes through the room, followed shortly by a terrific thud.
Sir looks up. "What was that dreadful noise?"
John steps over to the window and carefully looks from behind the curtains.
"Sir, a car just took a right turn".
"John, no car in the world would make such noise just for taking a right turn!"
"Sir, indeed, but you see, there was no street to the right".

From Elaine Boosler's cable special "Party of One."
There's this company that makes a shampoo called
"Gee Your Hair Smells Terrific." I hope they don't
start making feminine hygiene products.

Guess the following movie quotes. All movies were released between the years 1980 and 1989. Comedies, dramas, action, etc. Some are quite simple, and others are more difficult.

There are 37 items, followed by the answers at the bottom, so you may wish to save reading this for a less hectic portion of your day.

1) Joey, have you ever been in a Turkish prison?

2) We're on a mission from God.

3) People on' ludes should not drive.

4) This house is clean.

5) Shall we play a game?

6) Terrific!! I've got a trig mid-term tomorrow, and I'm being chased by Guido the killer pimp.

7) Back off man, I'm a scientist.

8) That's why they call them crushes. If they were easy, they'd call them something else.

9) I know a little German. He's sitting over there.

10) Can I borrow your towel, my car just hit a water buffalo.

11) Excuse me, Dick, I mean Rich, will milk be more...