Perfume Jokes / Recent Jokes

A young, beautiful woman gets into the elevator, smelling like expensive perfume. She turns to an old woman and says arrogantly, "Giorgio Beverly Hills, $100 an ounce!"
Another young, beautiful woman gets onto the elevator and also smells of very expensive perfume. She arrogantly turns to the old woman and says, "Chanel No. 5, $150 dollars an ounce!"
About three floors later, the old woman has reached her destination and is about to get off the elevator. Before she leaves, she looks both of the women in the eyes, farts, and says, "Broccoli, 49 cents a pound!"

The one blonde picks up a bottle of perfume that is titled "Vien Chez Moi." The blonde asks the manager what it means, and the manager says it means "Come to Me." So the blonde smells the perfume and asks her friend, "Does this smell like come to you? Cause it doesn't smell like come to me."

A young, beautiful woman gets into the elevator, smelling like expensive perfume. She turns to an old woman and says arrogantly, ''Giorgio Beverly Hills, $100 an ounce!''
Another young, beautiful woman gets onto the elevator and also smells of very expensive perfume. She arrogantly turns to the old woman and says, ''Chanel No. 5, $150 dollars an ounce!''
About three floors later, the old woman has reached her destination and is about to get off the elevator. Before she leaves, she looks both of the women in the eyes, turns around, bends over, farts and says, ''Broccoli, 49 cents a pound!''

42. Wear A LOT of putrid smelling cologne or perfume.43. Spill that same cologne or perfume on their book.44. Put down your book, then say, "Hey, ya wanna trade?"45. Bring a recording of very obnoxious music, and hide it in a bag. Turn it up full blast, and accuse them of having it. Keep accusing them, then get the librarian to come. When they find it in your bag, yell, "IT WAS PLANTED ON ME I TELL YOU!!! IT'S NOT MY FAULT! IT'S A GOVERNMENT CONSPIRACY! ALIENS BEAMED IT INTO MY BAG!!! IT'S BECAUSE I DIDN'T LET THEM DO EXPERIMENTS ON ME!!"46. Without looking away from your book, say to no one in particular, "I know what you did last summer."47. Bring a piece of bread, and drop pieces of it down the little hole in the center of the table meant for cords.48. While reading your book, start humming a single note until you're out of breath, then collapse on the floor. Then get back up, and continue reading like nothing happened.49. Start singing "This is more...

Edgar decided that an appropriate Christmas gift for his wife would be a bottle of perfume.. Nothing too expensive or overstated mind, just something simple and discrete.
So he went to a local store and located the cosmetics department.
"I would like to buy some perfume for my wife." he told the shop assistant.
"Certainly sir." she replied. "Do you have anything particular in mind?"
"Not really." he said "but nothing very expensive."
"I understand sir. Well, what about this one?"
"How much does it cost?"
"This one is sixty pounds sir
"That's too expensive for me." he replied immediately.
"Very well sir. How about this?"
"What's the price? he asked.
"Forty pounds sir."
"What else have you got?" he enquired.
"Well, there's this small bottle at twenty pounds."
"Look here." he more...

Why do women wear make up and perfume?
Because they're often under increasing pressure from a society which over- simplifies the process of ascertaining ones worth and attractiveness by reducing someone down to individual physical attributes.
. ..or is it because they're ugly and they smell bad?

An old woman is riding in an elevator in a very lavish New York City building when a young, beautiful woman gets into the elevator, smelling of expensive perfume.
She turns to the old woman and says arrogantly, "Romance" by Ralph Lauren, $150 an ounce!"
Then another young and beautiful woman gets on the elevator, and also very arrogantly turns to the old woman saying, "Chanel No. 5, $200 an ounce!"
About three floors later, the old woman has reached her destination and is about to get off the elevator. Before she leaves, she looks both beautiful women in the eye, then bends over and farts and says, "Broccoli - 49 cents a pound."