Passover Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Three blondes died and found themselves standing before Saint Peter at the gate to heaven. St. Peter said to them, “Before you may enter the gates of heaven you have to tell me what Easter is. ”
    The first blonde said, “Easter is a holiday where we all have a big feast and we’re thankful. ”
    St. Peter said, “NO! ” and banished her from heaven.
    The second blonde said, “Easter is a holiday where we celebrate Jesus’ birth and give each other presents. ”
    St. Peter said, “NO! ” and banished her from heaven.
    The third blonde said, “I know what Easter is. ”
    St. Peter said, “Ok then, tell me. ”
    She starts, “Easter is Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish festival of Passover. Jesus was having Passover feast with his disciples when he was betrayed by Judas, and the Romans arrested him. The Romans hung him on the cross where he died. Then they buried him in a tomb behind a large boulder. ”
    St. Peter said, more...

    Moisha Rabinowitz in the late 1930s fled his native land of Germany. He sold all his assets and converted it to gold and then had 5 sets of solid gold false teeth made.When he arrived in New York the customs official was perplexed as to why anybody would have 5 sets of gold teeth. So Moisha explained."We Orthodox Jews have two separate sets of dishes for meat products and dairy products but I am so kosher and religious I also have separate sets of teeth."The customs official shook his head and said, "Well that accounts for two sets of teeth. What about the other three?"Moisha then said "Vell us very religious Orthodox Jews use separate dishes for Passover, but I am so religious I have separate teeth, one for meat and one for dairy food.The customs official slapped his head and then said, "You must be a very religious man with separate teeth for food and dairy products and likewise for Passover. That accounts for four sets of teeth. What
    about the more...

    Paul says to Jesus, "Hey man, whatcha doing for Passover?"Jesus says, "Just hanging around."

    Moisha Rabinowitz in the late 1930s fled his native land of Germany.
    He sold all his assets and converted it to gold and then had 5 sets of solid gold false teeth made.
    When he arrived in New York the customs official was perplexed as to why anybody would have 5 sets of gold teeth.
    So Moisha explained: "We Orthodox Jews have two separate sets of dishes for meat products and dairy products but I am so kosher and religious I also have separate sets of teeth."
    The customs official shook his head and said, "Well that accounts for two sets of teeth. What about the other three?"
    Moisha then said "Vell us very religious Orthodox Jews use separate dishes for Passover, but I am so religious I have separate teeth, one for meat and one for dairy food.
    The customs official slapped his head and then said, "You must be a very religious man with separate teeth for food and dairy products and likewise for Passover. That accounts for four sets of more...

    Oy of the Beholder - Singles kvetch about their awful dates.
    Girls, Interrupted - Women's section of Shul shusshed during davening (prayers).
    The Seder House Rules - Zaydie lays down the law on Pesach.
    Angela's Kashas - Woman reveals secret recipes.
    The Six Cents - Three Jews each put in their two-cents' worth.
    Snow Falling on Seders - Unexpected storm disrupts Passover.
    Supernova - Space scientists discover powerful strain of lox.
    Dreydel Will Rock - Chanukah toy comes alive.
    Sleepy Hallah - On Friday night, father fills up on bread, dozes off.
    Stuart Ladle - Mouse makes chicken soup for Shabbos.
    The Whole Nine Yids - Struggling shul waits for tenth.
    The Green Mohel - Young man performs first circumcision
    Mun on the Moon - Astronauts discover hamantaschen filling, not green cheese, on lunar surface.
    Gonif with the Wind - A thief tries to acquire ownership of Tara through a forged deed.
    The Putzman Rings Twice - A mohel murder more...

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