Mystery Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two, one to screw it almost all the way in and the other to give it a surprising twist at the end.

Santa happened to participate in a competition, which was about writing the shortest story.
The organizers had put a condition that a story must have four ingredients viz. religion, sex, suspense and mystery.
When Santa`s turn came after many attempts by others. Santa`s story was of just one sentence which read "Oh god, my wife is going to deliver a child".
Ostensibly amused, the organizers asked the american whether it contained all the four ingredients! American replied affirmatively and gave his explanation as below:
Oh god: religion.
My wife: sex.
Going to deliver a child: suspense (whether a girl or a boy)
"Okay.... but where is the mystery?" asked one of the organizers.
Santa replied: who is the father? He was the winner for writing the shortest story!

A mystery surrounding the whereabouts of South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford was apparently solved late Monday when a Sanford spokesman said he was hiking along the Appalachian Trail. The spokesman said the governor was upset and just wanted to be alone after learning that Jon and Kate were getting a divorce.

How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two- One to screw in the idea, and one to give it a suprising twist at the end.

The Chocolate Ritual (You need to know a bit about wicca for this to be a knee slapper.. . )

Materials required: On the altar are brown candles, a Tootsie Roll (the big one), a large glass with milk in it (the chalice), a small dish of Nestle's Quik and a spoon, a small dish of chocolate sprinkles, a plate of cupcakes, and some Yoo-Hoo along with a goblet. The athame is represented by a cake knife reserved only for cutting Devil's Food Cake, and the pentacle is represented by a chocolate star.

CLEANSE THE SACRED SPACE:
(take the small bowl of chocolate sprinkles)

Chocolate sprinkles where thou art
Cast no calories in thy presence last.
Let no fat adhere to me
And as I will so mote it be!

Nestle's Quik where thou art cast
Turn this milk to chocolate fast.
Let all good things come to me,
and make my milk all chocolatey!

CAST THE CIRCLE
(using the Tootsie roll)

CALL THE more...

Take the mystery out of driving. Use your turn signal.

Solving the Mystery by Ivor Clew