Legion Jokes / Recent Jokes

A Captain in the foreign legion was transferred to a desert
outpost. On
his orientation tour he noticed a very old, seedy looking camel tied out
back
of the enlisted men's barracks. He asked the Sergeant leading the tour,
"What's the camel for?" The Sergeant replied, "Well sir, it's a long
way from
anywhere, and the men have natural sexual urges, so when they do, we
have the
camel." The Captain said "Well, if it's good for morale, then I guess
it's
all right with me." After he had been at the fort for about 6 months,
the
Captain could not stand it anymore, so he told his Sergeant, "BRING IN
THE
CAMEL!!!" The Sarge shrugged his shoulders and led the camel into the
Captain's quarters. The Captain got a foot stool and proceeded to have
vigorous sex with the camel. As he stepped, satisfied, down from the
stool
and was buttoning his pants he asked the Sergeant, "Is that more...

A company in the Foreign Legion had spent three years in the Sahara desert never having seen a woman. They finally decide to send one private on vacation to the nearest town to spend some time with a woman and tell themall about it. After a week the private comes back all happy and relaxed. The whole company crowds around him waiting to hear of his great escapades. "And on the third day..." he began. "No! no! start with the first day," Everyone yells out in chorus. "And on the third day, " the private continues " she asked me to stop so she could go to the bathroom..."

In the olden days of the Legion Etrangere (French Foreign Legion), Lieutenant Lefevre was extremely happy to be posted near Bir Ounane, right in the middle it seems, of the desert.
Boy howdy, did he enjoy the challenge of the elements, the demands for personal survival skills, the camaraderie of the other officers, etc! In fact, for four months, he enjoyed EVERYTHING!
Around the beginning of his fifth month there, a steady ache in his groin reminded him that the hadn't had any female companionship and that it was time to put his johnson back to work. He confided one day in Sergeant LeBrun: "Sergeant, I've got a personal problem. I need a woman. What do the men do when they have this urge?"
"Sir," responded Sergeant LeBrun, "there's no problem. They usually take the camel..."
"Non, non, non. Jamais! Never! Never!" screamed the lieutenant. "I will not descend to such low conduct."
Well, about two months later, he more...

A Captain in the foreign legion was transferred to a desert outpost. On his orientation tour he noticed a very old, seedy looking camel tied out back of the enlisted men's barracks. He asked the Sergeant leading the tour, "What's the camel for?"
The Sergeant replied, "Well sir, it's a long way from anywhere, and the men have natural sexual urges, so when they do, we have the camel."
The Captain said "Well, if it's good for morale, then I guess it's all right with me." After he had been at the fort for about 6 months, the Captain could not stand it anymore, so he told his Sergeant, "BRING IN THE CAMEL!!!"
The Sarge shrugged his shoulders and led the camel into the Captain's quarters. The Captain got a foot stool and proceeded to have vigorous sex with the camel. As he stepped, satisfied, down from the stool and was buttoning his pants he asked the Sergeant, "Is that how the enlisted men do it?" The Sergeant replied, more...

A woman reporter is driving a jeep in the desert. She sees a Captain in the French Foreign Legion pulling and tugging on a camel, but the camel won't budge.The woman stops and says, "Captain! Do you need some help with the camel?"The legionarie tells her the camel won't budge but she's welcome to try. The reporter gets out of the jeep, takes two bricks from the back and POW... smashes the camel's testicles with the bricks. The camel makes a terrible noise and runs off into the desert.The captain drops his pants and says, "Great! Do me next, I've got to catch that son of a bitch!"