Grocer Jokes / Recent Jokes

A young boy, about seven years old, was at the corner grocery picking out a box of laundry detergent. The grocer walked over and trying to be friendly, asked the boy if he had a lot of laundry to do.
"No laundry" the boy said, "I'm going to wash my dog."
"But you shouldn't use this to wash your dog. It's very powerful and if you wash your dog in this, he'll get sick. In fact, it might even kill him."
But the boy was not to be stopped and carried the detergent to the counter and paid for it, even as the grocer still tried to talk him out of washing his dog.
About a week later the boy was back in the store to buy some candy. The grocer asked the boy how his dog was doing.
"Oh, he died," the boy said.
The grocer, trying not to be an I-told-you-so, said he was sorry the dog died but added, "I tried to tell you not to use that detergent on your dog."
The boy replied, "I don't think it was the detergent that more...

A young boy, about seven years old, was at the corner grocery picking out a box of laundry detergent. The grocer walked over and trying to be friendly, asked the boy if he had a lot of laundry to do."No laundry" the boy said, "I'm going to wash my dog.""But you shouldn't use this to wash your dog. It's very powerful and if you wash your dog in this, he'll get sick. In fact, it might even kill him."But the boy was not to be stopped and carried the detergent to the counter and paid for it, even as the grocer still tried to talk him out of washing his dog.About a week later the boy was back in the store to buy some candy. The grocer asked the boy how his dog was doing."Oh, he died," the boy said.The grocer, trying not to be an I-told-you-so, said he was sorry the dog died but added, "I tried to tell you not to use that detergent on your dog."The boy replied, "I don't think it was the detergent that killed him.""Oh, What was more...

A young boy, about eight years old, was at the corner "Mom& Pop" grocery picking out a pretty good size box of laundrydetergent. The grocer walked over, and, trying to be friendly, asked the boy if he had a lot of laundry to do. "Oh, no laundry," the boy said, "I'm going to wash my dog." "But you shouldn't use this to wash your dog. It's verypowerful and if you wash your dog in this, he'll get sick. Infact, it might even kill him." But the boy was not to be stopped and carried the detergentto the counter and paid for it, even as the grocer still tried totalk him out of washing his dog. About a week later the boy was back in the store to buy somecandy. The grocer asked the boy how his dog was doing. "Oh, he died," the boy said. The grocer, trying not to be an "I-told-you-so", said he wassorry the dog died but added, "I tried to tell you not to usethat detergent on your dog." "Well, the boy replied, "I don't more...

A young boy, about eight years old, was at the corner "Mom & Pop" grocery store picking out a pretty good size box of laundry detergent. The grocer walked over and, trying to be friendly, asked the boy if he had a lot of laundry to do.

"Oh, no laundry," the boy said. "I'm going to wash my dog."

"But you shouldn't use this to wash your dog. It's very powerful and if you wash your dog in this, he'll get sick. In fact, it might even kill him."

But the boy was not to be stopped and carried the detergent to the counter and paid for it, even as the grocer still tried to talk him out of washing his dog.

About a week later the boy was back in the store to buy some candy. The grocer asked the boy how his dog was doing.

"Oh, he died," the boy said.

The grocer, trying not to be an I-told-you-so, said he was sorry the dog died but added, "I tried to tell you not to use that more...

It wasn't long after the town grocer gave his beautiful teen-age daughter a job as clerk in his store that the local wolves began dropping by almost daily with requests for items stocked on the highest shelves, since each time the pretty little thing had to climb up a ladder to fill their orders, they were assured a spectacular view. Being as naive as she was attractive, the daughter didn't catch on; she tried rearranging the stock a few times, but no matter how she planned it, her male customers always seemed to ask for the items she put at the top. One day an elderly gent happened to enter the store while a contingent of these young cads was sending the poor girl up and down the ladder, each one in turn ordering a loaf of raisin bread from the top shelf. Hoping to save herself an additional trip while still aloft on her eighth successive climb to the same height, the girl called down to the senior citizen, "Is yours
raisin, too?"
"Nope," said the more...

A grocer once had a daughter born to him. One day a friend of his made a match for his baby girl, and told him the future husband was only one year older than she was. The grocer discussed this marriage in private with his wife. "Our daughter is just one, the boy's age is the double of hers; when she is twenty and gets married, her husband will be forty," he said. "How do we have the heart to marry off our daughter to such an old husband?" His wife smiled and said, "You're really dumb. Our daughter is now one year old, in one years time she'll be the same age as the boy, now won't she?

A pompous self made grocer named Bates gets his son into an expensive private school On day One the whole family is there to see the little blighter begin his first day at school The grocer his family in tow saunters into the principal`s office and introduces himself thus: "I am Sir Shortweight Bates. This is my wife, Lady Bates, my daughter Miss Bates and my son Master Bates." "Oh does he?" asks the bemused principal, "we will soon get him out of that terrible habit."