Goat Jokes / Recent Jokes

What happened to the man who tried to cross a lioin with a goat? He had to get a new goat!

While working on a message the pastor heard a knock at his office door. "Come in," he invited.
A contrite-looking man in threadbare clothes came in, pulling a goat on a rope, "Can I talk to you for a minute?" asked the man with his hat in his hand.
Wordlessly, the pastor indicated the chair and the man sat down in it gingerly. The goat proceeded to sniff around the office.
With one eye on the animal and one on the man, the pastor folded his hands on his desk and leaned forward, curious to hear the fellow's story, "What can I do for you?"
"My family is hungry," started the man. "So I stole this goat. But I feel that I have sinned. Would you please take it?"
"Certainly not," said the minister.
"Then what should I do with it?" asked the man.
"Give it back to the man you stole it from, of course!" the pastor explained.
"I offered it to him, but he refused to take it. Now more...

Q:Do you know what happened to the grass after it met the goat?
A: it went bald

Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Goat.
Goat who?
Goat to the door and find out! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Goat!
Goat who!
Goat to bat!

Q. What`s the difference between Elvis and Osama Bin Laden?
A. Osama is a dead man!
Q. What do Monica Lewinsky and Osama Bin Laden have in common?
A. They both blew a power structure!!
To catch Osama Bin Laden, Grandpa sez:
Spray Afghanistan with Viagra and the little prick will pop up!
Q. Why does Osama Bin Laden collect goat shit?
A. Because it`s a great growing culture for anthrax, and it makes terrific deodorant.
Q. Why did Osama fire Martha Stewart?
A. She was unable to find fabric that went with stalagmites.
Q. What do you call a Taliban with a goat and a sheep?
A. Bisexual.
Q. Why did the Taliban school alternate Sex Education classes with Drivers Ed.?
A. They only had one camel.
Q. What`s another name for the DaisyCutter bomb?
A. The TaliWhacker.
Q. Why do the Taliban wear robes?
A. A goat can hear a zipper a mile away.
Q. Know what the Taliban do for fun?
A. Sit around and get more...

A farmer asked a friend to recommend an attorney to defend him against a charge of bestiality. "I know a great trial lawyer," the fellow said, "but he's expensive and doesn't know how to pick a jury. I know another lawyer," he continued, "who's not a great trial lawyer, but he's cheap and really knows how to pick a jury."

The farmer settled on the cheap attorney, but immediately had second thoughts when the key witness, a neighbor, began his testimony. "I saw Jud mount his goat from behind," he said, "and when he was finished, I saw the goat turn around and lick Jud's pecker."

The accused farmer was devastated and had all but given up hope of acquittal when a juror in overalls whispered to the fellow next to him, "You know, a good goat will do that."

A man, heavily drunk, went to church on a Sunday, few minutes before the mass began. The priest, who was standing outside the church, asked him, "Don't you now that it is a sin to come to church after drinking alcohol?" The man replied coolly, "I know that, Father. I have come to confess, to purge my sins." Religious
Man On an Island "A man, his dog, his goat and their needed supplies are on a great ship. During a wicked storm lightning hits it and the boat sinks they wash up on shore, the man, the dog, the goat, and even the needed supplies.
The man then pops a boner, he looks at the dog, "Nah!", says the man. looks at the goat, "Eh what the hell.", and he tries to screw the goat. the dog bites his arm and gets him away from the goat for a few days.
A few days later he spots a woman on a boat in the middle of the ocean. He swims out there and saves her. Then he realizes, "God Damn shes hot!" She wakes up and says, more...