Goat Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Two guys were hiking in the mountains when they came across an old mine shaft going straight down into the ground."Wow," said the first guy. "I wonder how deep it is?""I dunno," said the second. "Let's find out." With that, he dropped a rock down the hole. They waitedand waited, but didn't hear it hit bottom."Hmm. Let's try a bigger rock," said the first guy, and tossed a watermelon-sized stone down the hole. They waited a couple of minutes, but didn't hear it hit either. So, they looked around for something bigger to throw down and came across an old railroad tie, which they lifted together and dumped down the hole. Then suddenly, as they waited to hear it hit, a goat streaked between the two of them and jumped straight down the mineshaft.While they stood there scratching their heads in amazement, a third guy came up the path and asked them if they'd seen a goat."Yeah, just now," said one of the first two guys. "It just more...

    There's this white ecologist working with an African tribe, and one day the tribe elder comes to him and says, "My wife just had just a baby, and it's white. You're the only white man within hundreds of miles of here."
    The ecologist gulps and says, "Well, some things in nature just can't be explained. Look at that herd of goats, for example. All of them are white except for that one black goat. This is probably like that."
    Finally, the Tribe elder nods and says, "Well, all right, I'll keep quiet about my white baby, if you'll keep quiet about that black goat."

    Two guys were hiking in the mountains when they came across an old mine shaft going straight down into the ground.
    "Wow," said the first guy. "I wonder how deep it is?"
    "I dunno," said the second.
    "Let's find out." With that, he dropped a rock down the hole.   They waitedand waited, but didn't hear it hit bottom.
    "Hmm. Let's try a bigger rock," said the first guy, and tossed a watermelon-sized stone down the hole. They waited a couple of minutes, but didn't hear it hit either. So, they looked around for something bigger to throw down and came across an old railroad tie, which they lifted together and dumped down the hole. Then suddenly, as they waited to hear it hit, a goat streaked between the two of them and jumped straight down the mineshaft.
    While they stood there scratching their heads in amazement, a third guy came up the path and asked them if they'd seen a goat.
    "Yeah, just now," said more...

    The Suicidal Goat

    Hot 1 year ago

    A guy who was tired with life in the big city decided to take a vacation and go to the mountain, so he rented a chalet in the wilderness.
    One day, as he was strolling, he got to the edge of a precipice. He carefully looked down and backed quickly, amazed: "gee, is this deep!". He took a pebble and threw it in, to see how long it takes until it gets down. It took a while, so he thought "that's really deep"; then he found a big stone and tossed it, and when it hit the ground with an almost inaudible sound he reckoned "this is what I call deep". Having nothing else to do, he started to look around a found a large piece of rail. He strained a while, as it was pretty heavy, rusted and muddy, but he managed to push it over the cliff, and after some time, when he heard it hitting the ground with abig blast, he reasoned: "now that's something!".
    He had just seated himself to rest and start meditating at the abyssal dimensions, when he saw a more...

    10. Secretly replace the baby's formula with Folger's Crystals.
    9. Get a couple of old refrigerator boxes and paint them up to look like a toll booth. Set it up on your favorite street corner and watch the quarters roll in.
    8. Make yourself up like you've been in a horrible, mutilating accident, then go to the emergency room of the nearest hospital. When approached by a nurse or doctor, say, "No, thank-you, I'm
    just browsing."
    7. Call the Microsoft Support Line and insist on speaking directly to Bill Gates. Tell them that MS-DOS was your idea and you demand royalties. Demand Bill's home phone number. Get verbally abusive when they refuse you.
    6. Two words: Cherry Bomb.
    5. Make two dinner reservations at the finest restaurant you can find, then dress yourself and a goat in tuxedos. When the Management refuses you service, insist that the animal is a
    seeing-eye goat. For added effect, feed the goat a few boxes of EX-LAX before you arrive.
    4. more...

  • Recent Activity