Goals Jokes / Recent Jokes

The Court of King George IIILondon, EnglandJuly 10, 1776Mr. Thomas Jeffersonc/o The Continental CongressPhiladelphia, PennsylvaniaDear Mr. Jefferson: We have read your "Declaration of Independence" with great interest. Certainly, it represents a considerable undertaking, and many of your statements do merit serious consideration. Unfortunately, the Declaration as a whole fails to meet recently adopted specifications for proposals to the Crown, so we must return the document to you for further refinement. The questions which follow might assist you in your process of revision: 1. In your opening paragraph you use the phrase "the Laws of Nature and Nature's God." What are these laws? In what way are they the criteria on which you base your central arguments? Please document with citations from the recent literature. 2. In the same paragraph you refer to the "opinions of mankind." Whose polling data are you using? Without specific evidence, it seems to us more...

The Court of King George III
London, England July 10, 1776 Mr. Thomas Jefferson
c/o The Continental Congress
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania Dear Mr. Jefferson: We have read your "Declaration of Independence" with great interest. Certainly, it represents a considerable undertaking, and many of your statements do merit serious consideration. Unfortunately, the Declaration as a whole fails to meet recently adopted specifications for proposals to the Crown, so we must return the document to you for further refinement. The questions which follow might assist you in your process of revision: In your opening paragraph you use the phrase "the Laws of Nature and Nature's God." What are these laws? In what way are they the criteriaon which you base your central arguments? Please document with citations from the recent literature. In the same paragraph you refer to the "opinions of mankind." Whose polling data are you using? Without specific evidence, it more...

The Court of King George III
London, England
July 10, 1776
Mr. Thomas Jefferson
c/o The Continental Congress
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Dear Mr. Jefferson:
We have read your "Declaration of Independence" with great interest. Certainly, it represents a considerable undertaking, and many of your statements do merit serious consideration. Unfortunately, the Declaration as a whole fails to meet recently adopted specifications for proposals to the Crown, so we must return the document to you for further refinement. The questions which follow might assist you in your process of revision:
1.In your opening paragraph you use the phrase "the Laws of Nature and Nature's God." What are these laws? In what way are they the criteria on which you base your central arguments? Please document with citations from the recent literature.
2.In the same paragraph you refer to the "opinions of mankind." Whose polling data are you using? more...

The Court of King George IIILondon, EnglandJuly 10, 1776Mr. Thomas Jeffersonc/o The Continental CongressPhiladelphia, PennsylvaniaDear Mr. Jefferson:We have read your "Declaration of Independence" with great interest. Certainly, it represents a considerable undertaking, and many of your statements do merit serious consideration. Unfortunately, the Declaration as a whole fails to meet recently adopted specifications for proposals to the Crown, so we must return the document to you for further refinement. The questions which follow might assist you in your process of revision:1.In your opening paragraph you use the phrase "the Laws of Nature and Nature's God." What are these laws? In what way are they the criteria on which you base your central arguments? Please document with citations from the recent literature.2.In the same paragraph you refer to the "opinions of mankind." Whose polling data are you using? Without specific evidence, it seems to us the more...

Goals are deceptive. The unaimed arrow never misses.

Process-Oriented God If God was process oriented, the Book of Genesis might read something like this: In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. The earth was without form and void, so God created a small committee. He carefully balanced the committee vis-a-vis race, gender, ethnic origin, and economic status in order to interface pluralism with the holistic concept of self-determination according to adjudicatory guidelines. Even God was impressed, and so ended the first day. And God said, "Let the committee draw up a mission statement." And behold, the committee decided to prioritize and strategize and God called that process empowerment. And God thought it sounded pretty good. And evening and morning were the second day. And God said, "Let the committee determine goals and objectives and engage in long-term planning." Unfortunately, a debate about the semantic differences between goals and objectives pre-empted almost all of the third day. Although more...

The Court of King George III London, England

July 10, 1776

Mr. Thomas Jefferson
c/o The Continental Congress Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Dear Mr. Jefferson,

We have read your "Declaration of Independence" with great interest. Certainly, it represents a considerable undertaking, and many of your statements do merit serious consideration. Unfortunately, the Declaration as a whole fails to meet recently adopted specifications for proposals to the Crown, so we must return the document to you for further refinement. The questions which follow might assist you in your process of revision:

1. In your opening paragraph you use the phrase the "Laws of Nature and Nature`s God." What are these laws? In what way are they the criteria on which you base your central arguments? Please document with citations from the recent literature.

2. In the same paragraph you refer to the "opinions of mankind." more...