Fewer Jokes / Recent Jokes

A) The Japanese consume very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.
B) On the other hand, the French consume a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.
C) The Japanese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.
D) The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.
E) Conclusion: Eat and drink what you like. It's speaking English that kills you.

It takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown, and fewer still to ignore someone completely.

10. It doesn't take minutes to build the picture when you change TV channels.

9. When was the last time you tuned in to "Melrose Place" and got a "Not Found 404" message?

8. There are fewer grating color schemes on TV. Even on MTV.

7. The family never argues over which Web site to visit this evening.

6. A remote control has fewer buttons than a keyboard.

5. Even the worst TV shows never excuse themselves with an "Under Construction" sign.

4. Seinfeld never slows down when a lot of people tune in.

3. You just can't find those cool Health Rider infomercials on the Web.

2. Set-top boxes don't beep and whine when you hook up to HBO.

1. You can't surf the Web from a couch with a beer in one hand and Doritos in the other

It takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown - and fewer still to ignore someone completely.

Always take the time to smell the roses... and sooner or later you'll inhale a bee.
If a motorist cuts you off, just turn the other cheek... nothing gets the message across like a good mooning.
If genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration, I must be sharing elevators with a lot of bright people.
It's always darkest just before dawn...so if you're gonna steal the neighbors' newspaper, that's the time to do it.
It takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown... and fewer still to ignore someone completely.
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked up into jet engines.
I believe no problem is so large or so difficult that it can't be blamed on someone else.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
My father always said laughter is the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us ended up dying of tuberculosis.
It takes a big man to cry.. .but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.
When I'm feeling down I like to more...