Bobby Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday School teacher said, "Bobby, when I was a child I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that."

    Bobby looked up and replied, "Well, Ms Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."

    It is the spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date, Carrie.

    He's a pretty hip guy with his own car. When he goes to the front door, Carries father answers and invites him in.

    'Carrie's not ready yet, so why don't you have a seat?' her dad said.

    'That's cool', says Bobby.

    Carrie's father asks Bobby what they're planning to do. Bobby replies politely that they will probably just go to the soda shop or a movie.

    Carrie's father responds' why don't you two go somewhere and screw? I hear all the kids are doing it.'

    Bobby, is not quite sure he heard correctly, so he asks Carries dad to repeat what was just said.

    'Yeah', her dad says,' Carrie really likes to screw; she'll screw all night if we let her!'

    Well, this certainly made Bobby's emotions light up. Now he's REALLY looking forward to the evening.

    A few minutes later, Carrie comes downstairs in her little poodle skirt and announces more...

    One day in Sunday school, the teacher was talking about Jesus is to the kids, "Bobby, where is Jesus?" asked the teacher. "Jesus is in heaven." replied Bobby. "Very good!", said the teacher. The teacher then asked a little girl," Where is Jesus, Emily?". Emily said innocently, "Jesus is in my heart!". The teacher beamed at little Emily and said, "How very sweet!!!". The teacher now asked Timmy, "Timmy, where is Jesus?". "Jesus is in my bathroom." he said assuredly. "Please elaborate, Timmy.", the teacher said. Timmy then replied, "Well, every morning my dad gets up, bangs on the bathroom door and yells. Jesus Christ, are you still in there!!!"

    One evening during the Spring of 1957 Bobby, a hip guy with his own car, goes to pick up his date. He goes to the front door and the girl's father answers, inviting him in.
    "Carrie's not quite ready yet. Why don't you have a seat?" he says.
    "Cool," Bobby replies.
    Carrie's father asks Bobby what their plans are. Bobby politely says that they'll probably go to a movie or the soda shop.
    "Why don't the two of you go out and screw?" Carrie's father says. "I hear all the kids are doing it."
    Of course, this comes as quite a surprise to Bobby, so he asks Carrie's dad to repeat it.
    "Oh yeah," says Carrie's dad, "our Carrie really likes to screw. If we'd let her, she'd screw all night long."
    Hearing this makes Bobby's eyes light up and his plan for the evening is starting to look pretty good.
    A few minutes later, Carrie enters the room in her poodle skirt and tells Bobby that she's ready to go. A little more...

    A teacher decides to have Career Day in her class. She asks each student to tell the class what their father's job is, spell it, and then explain what they do.
    Mary stands up and says, "My father is a policeman. P -O-L-I-C-E-M-A-N. He puts bad people in jail and keeps us all safe."
    Sue stands up next and says, "My father is a doctor. D-O-C-T-O-R. He helps sick people get better."
    Bobby is next. He stands up and says, "My father is a pharmacist. F...F-R..."
    The teacher tells Bobby to sit down and try to figure it out and moves on to the next kid.
    Johnny stands up next and says, "My father is a bookie. B-O-O-K-I-E. He'd give you 10-1 odds that Bobby is never going to spell 'pharmacist.'"

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