Dolly Parton Jokes

Dolly Parton has postponed her upcoming tour due to back problems caused by her breasts.

You’d think at 62 years of age, her breasts wouldn’t be damaging her back, but damaging sidewalks she strolls down.

Dolly Parton's breasts may be two of the wonders of the entertainment world, but the country music icon says they are a pain in her back. Parton, 62, said on Monday she would postpone her upcoming North American tour after doctors told her to take it easy for six to eight weeks to rest her sore back.

You heard right. Dolly Parton is officially on breast rest.

Dolly Parton received a doctorate of letters--DD to be exact.

We’re back in 1976 and I am in sixth grade. And much to my initial delight, Miss Rotenberg (the emetic virago assigned to teach the little ones French) is absent (perhaps she fell off her broomstick?). Instead, we have a substitute teacher – a large, lumpy fellow who bears an uncanny resemblance to Mr. Potato Head.

I cannot recall his real name, but it didn’t matter since he had his own special ID for my class. “I’m the Answer Man!” he declared with the enthusiasm one associates with the discovery of gold or a life-saving pill. “Ask me any question you have and I will answer it!”

My class, which was never challenged by Miss Rotenberg’s prattling, suddenly became animated with the glory of being asked to participate in something that was genuinely fun and perhaps a bit daring – it was unusual for an adult to lay down an intellectual challenge to a sixth grade class.

To his credit, the Answer Man kept his word – he did answer the more...